Free The House at Midnight by Lucie Whitehouse Page A

step. There couldn't be any going back once we had been to bed together. But the impulsive side of me was disappointed that he had been able to do it. That side wished that he had dragged me to his room the moment we set foot in the flat. However much I tried to rationalise it, I couldn't dispel the feeling that if he'd really wanted me he would never have sent me home.

Chapter Five
    When I woke at Stoneborough that Saturday, Lucas had moulded himself against me so that my body fitted inside the curve of his larger one as neatly as a layer in an onion. It was early. I could tell from the slow pattern of his breath on my shoulder that he was still sleeping and I shifted gently so that I could lie more comfortably without waking him. He murmured something uninterpretable and settled again.
    It had been just five of us the previous evening, as Greg and Rachel had had to stay in London for dinner with one of Greg's new clients. We'd had supper in the kitchen and then taken our drinks through and sat around the fire in the drawing room. It was still early when Lucas and I made an exit.
    'Be gentle with him, Joanna.' Danny hadn't been able to resist. Although I knew it was stupid, I flushed with embarrassment and couldn't think of a response.
    'Please, Danny,' said Lucas. He squeezed my hand as he pulled the drawing-room door shut. 'Just ignore him.' I waited nervously in the hall while he set the burglar alarm, shifting my weight from foot to foot.
    His room was next to mine on the top floor. He hadn't shown it to me when we did the grand tour. It was plain, done in white with white sheets on the bed, but taking up almost the whole of the wall opposite the bed was a painting that I recognised.
    'Lucas, isn't that ... ?'
    'Not now.'
    His hands moved over me surprisingly. At Stoneborough things were different, as if his personality changed subtly when he stepped over the threshold. I felt as if I were with someone bolder. There was no question about what was going to happen. His hands slipped into the back pockets of my jeans and held me hard against him as we kissed. After a while he pulled away and pushed me gently back on to the bed. My heart soared with relief at his obvious desire. He did want me and the knowledge turned me on, too. When we had taken off all of each other's clothes I took a second or two to look at him. His nakedness made the parts of his body I was familiar with from days at the beach and in the park look different. I could see the weight loss around his chest and stomach and it moved me, as if I could read his sadness on his body. He looked vulnerable.
    I had fantasised - I was embarrassed to admit it even to myself - of how it would be with Lucas, whom at times I had allowed myself to think of as a soul mate. I had imagined all the closeness of our emotional relationship would transfer to the physical and there would be none of the awkwardness or fumbling around that reminded one of what a strange thing it was to have sex with someone. Instead it would be seamless, both of us knowing exactly what the other liked, and there would be none of the usual self-consciousness at being naked and utterly revealed to someone else. In fact, there had been a very awkward moment when Lucas had had to stop to find a condom and the pause had broken the spell. I caught his eye as he was putting it on. We looked at each other as if we were suddenly realising what we were doing and questioning whether we should. I winked at him then, to make him smile and dispel the tension. Things got a bit better after that and the second time had been an improvement again. I was sure it would be different as we got used to the idea.
    I lay awake now for a while watching the morning brighten the window, enjoying the warmth of the bed and of his body behind me. After ten minutes or so, he stirred and I wriggled round so that we were facing one another. He opened his eyes and smiled at me. 'Morning,' he said, pushing a strand of hair out of my