back here to Iowa to care for her sick mother. When her mother left us all two years ago, Ms. Speck stayed. I guess when youâve already lived in New York and Paris, thereâs no point in trying anywhere else.
âIâd like to remind you,â Ms. Speck begins, âthat as the guidance counselor here at Coral Sands High, I am always availableto speak with you about anything, and our conversations are absolutely confidential. Sexual violence of any kind can be frightening and unsettling, also confusing. I encourage you to talk about any concerns or feelings you may have with your parents or with me or one of the other teachers here. You can use the school website to sign up for an appointment with me, or stop by the French room. My email and contact information are on the bulletin board.â
Principal Hargrove comes back to the mic to say one more thing. âRemember that this is an ongoing investigation. We will be cooperating with the police, and some of you may be asked to surrender your phones and tablets. Apparently, there were pictures and videos circulating of the event in question. If you have any evidence at all, we urge you to come forward. We will help you make a report to the proper authorities.â
This final announcement bounces across the gym like a stick of dynamite, which rolls to a stop beneath the bleachers. The Coral Sands basketball elite are seated all around me. Every single person I can see was at Dooneyâs party, and each one of them had their phone out that night at one point or another.
Rachel and Christy tap at their screens like mad. The principalâs words, âsurrender your phone or tabletâ have ignited a fuse, and whispers erupt all over the gym.
Bullshit.
Nobodyâs taking my phone, Iâll guarantee you that.
Homes, you fucking crazy.
Fascists. They canât treat us like that.
Who they think is about to win âem the state tourney?
âWow,â Lindsey says. âHave you seen this?â She is scrolling through her phone, and I pick mine up to open Twitter.
I immediately regret it:
@B1gBlue32: Wait, the police can take my phone cause U R A SLUT? #buccsincuffs
@BuccsRock: Gonna rape her good for SURE now. #r&p #buccsincuffs
@Pheebus17: White trash ho was so drunk she couldnât tell a dick from a donut. #buccsincuffs
@j#mpsh0t: JAIL: what u get for inviting a TRAMP to the party #buccsincuffs
@fr0nt¢er: If we lose state cause of this whore sheâs gonna get more than raped. #r&p #buccsincuffs
A sudden sickness wells up in my throat. The picture of Stacey draped over Deaconâs shoulder is attached to several tweets, and I realize that sheâs the target of every vile word Iâm reading. I know weâre not close anymore, but I canât help picturing the girl who used to play soccer with us. Long before the Stacey with the dark eyeliner, the long bright nails, and the pot hookup, she was just this other girl on the team.
She was our friend.
Stacey came over to my house a couple times back in seventh grade after Saturday morning games. Her mom was waiting tables and wouldnât be off until later in the afternoon.We were trying to study for a vocabulary quiz one time, and Stacey kept looking out my window at the birdbath, naming the birds. I saw that her vocab worksheet was covered in doodles. A flock of tiny sparrows and blue jays hovered in the margins and corners. She had an old leather-bound field guide in her backpack. She said it was from the Audubon Society and that she wanted to be an ornithologist. I didnât even know what that meant.
âItâs a person who studies birds,â she told me.
âWhy do you like birds so much?â I asked.
A look of pity flitted over her face, followed by a smile. âBecause they can fly, silly.â
I give my head a little shake, trying to clear the images in my mind and the heaviness in my chest, but the picture of Stacey tossed so