Free No Longer Mine by Shiloh Walker Page B

ring.
    Jamie’s dead.
    Nikki felt as though the ground had opened up under her, leaving her standing on thin air. Scrabbling for purchase.
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    No Longer Mine
    The woman she had spent years hating was suddenly no longer alive to hate. One hand went to rub at her stomach, which was churning with all the stress she was keeping bottled up.
    Shakily, she said, “I’m sorry.” Her gaze flew up to meet his, certain she would see total desolation there, but all she saw was a distant sort of regret before he turned away, staring out into the trees that lined the northwestern side of her property.
    Wade was silent for so long she wondered if he was going to speak at all. When he finally did, his voice was so quiet she could hardly hear him.
    “Don’t be. She was miserable with me, Nicole. I did the best I could, but I couldn’t give her what she wanted. She never could understand that I didn’t love her, that I was only there because of Abby. She had my name and a ring, but nothing else.”
    Turning to her, Wade stared at her with intense eyes, mesmerizing eyes. Unable to look away, Nikki sat helplessly as he moved closer to her. He sank down on his knees in front of her, reaching out to trace the line of her jaw with a feathery touch. Softly, he said, “She could never understand that in my heart, I still belonged to you.”
    “Don’t say that, Wade. We ended the night you told me she was pregnant.” Jerking her face away from his touch, Nikki gave a harsh laugh. “Hell. We were over the night you spent with her. I just didn’t know it.”
    “None of that changed the fact that I loved you. None of that changed the fact that I still do love you.” Still staring at her with those dark eyes that held her pinned to her seat, he lifted her left hand, studying it intently. Gently, he pressed a kiss to the back of it. If he noticed the trembling, he didn’t remark on it.
    “No wedding ring, Nikki. But is there somebody in your heart now? Am I going to have to fight to get you back?” His voice dropped as he spoke, as he hooked one hand behind her head, drawing her closer.
    His softly spoken words, dark hypnotic eyes had soothed her, lulled her into believing, into hoping, dreaming. If only , she thought wistfully.
    The gentle touch of his lips on hers broke her out of her spell.
    “No,” Nikki said, her voice faint. “No.” Her voice was stronger this time. She shoved him away and shot to her feet, moving to the far railing. “I’m not interested in rekindling an old flame, Wade. I’m certainly not interested in reliving the past or rebuilding something between us.”
    “Why not?” Wade asked, moving on silent feet until he stood so close she could feel his body heat warming her back.
    Turning around, she pressed a hand against his chest, determined to keep him at a distance. It wasn’t enough though. And it didn’t help. She could feel the heat of him, the warmth. She could feel his heart racing against her hand.
    This is too much ,she thought desperately. Too much.

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    47

    Shiloh Walker
    Harshly, she said, “You turned out to be everything I hate in people. You betrayed me. You lied to me.”
    Wade flinched at her words like she had slapped him. And then she turned her back on him, staring out in the trees.

    Nikki’s words lashed at him, pouring salt into the still-open wounds of his heart. His guilt over what had happened had never eased, but he had succeeded in burying it. Now it returned in full force, making his gut clench and his throat constrict. Reaching for her, he started to speak, “Nikki—” But she cringed away from his hands.
    Nikki flinched away when he turned her around to face him. “I don’t want you touching me, Wade,” she said, her voice thick. “I don’t want you here. So go away.” Without waiting to see if he listened, she edged around him and headed for the door. Without sparing him one last glance, she disappeared inside