Free Reality Check by Niki Burnham Page A

credit.) But it is someone truly inappropriate—which is why I
can't tell Christie or Nat—and it is someone at work.
    Okay. Sit down. Or brace yourself or whatever
it is you're supposed to do for big news.
    Did you do it? (Deep breath....)
    I have inexplicably developed this complete,
total, all-encompassing obsession with the new night manager.
    I know, I know. It goes against all logic.
He's far more likely to be a toad than a prince. But what can I do?
I have it bad. I can't stop thinking about him.
    Tell me again that guys are nothing but a
headache and that I should stay away.
    Tell me that I am much better off without
guys, just as I have been for fifteen years now.
    Even better, tell me there is a cure so I can
make this sickness go away.
    Jules, feeling like a Grade A Idiot with
hormone poisoning
     
    * * *
     
    To: [email protected]
    From: [email protected]
    Subject: This and That and Jules
     
    Hi Valerie!
    How's everything in Schwerinborg? We're doing
WWI in Mrs. Bennett's class, and so she had this big map of Europe
out today and I was trying to see Schwerinborg. It was tough to
pick out from the back row, but it still made me think of you.
    Well, and the fact that you'd probably ace
the exam we have in her class this Friday. I'm dying trying to
study for it without you.
    Anyway—have you heard anything from Jules in
the last day or two? I picked her up after she got off work at
Wendy's on Sunday night and she was acting all weird. I asked her
how work went and she didn't complain like she usually does. She
said it was "fine" and that was it. And yes, I'm sure it's our
Jules and she wasn't kidnapped by aliens and replaced with an
identical twin, because she snarled her Jules Snarl when I told her
she didn't seem like herself.
    It was like she didn't want to talk at all.
She was quiet the whole way home in the car, other than the "fine"
and the animal noises.
    It gets worse.
    Yesterday, she went straight to work after
school even though it meant she'd be early for her shift AND it
meant I couldn't give her a ride because I had to find Jeremy and
give him his water bottle before track practice (he accidentally
left it in my locker.) She wasn't even willing to wait five minutes
for me to see Jeremy!
    And right now I can see that she's online,
but she's ignoring me.
    Something isn't right. I think she's mad at
me, but I don't know what I could have done. Natalie says it's just
Jules being Jules and that she's probably PMS'ing or something, but
I don't know.
    So have you talked to her?
    Christie
     
    * * *
     
    To: [email protected]
    From: [email protected]
    Subject: RE: This and That and Jules
     
    Christie,
    I hate to say it, but Natalie is probably
right. You know how Jules can get. Things are always better if you
just leave her alone and let her get out of her funk on her own.
She knows you're there for her if she needs you.
    In the meantime, credit PMS for Jules's
grumpy-girl attitude and don't think about it anymore.
    And I've seen Mrs. Bennett's map.
Schwerinborg is practically non-existent, but it's on there. Squint
at the border between Austria and Germany and look for the little
red star. That's Freital, the capital city. I'm right there.
    As for studying, the only thing I know about
WWI is that a prince from some small European country got
assassinated and that started the whole thing. (And no, it was a
not a prince from Schwerinborg. Don't even THINK it.) So start your
studying with that little factoid. You know how Mrs. Bennett likes
death and destruction and "who got killed when..." questions on her
exams.
    Good luck Friday!
    Miss you lots and lots,
    Val
     
    * * *
     
    To: [email protected]
    From: [email protected]
    Subject: Stop the Madness!
     
    Dear Valerie,
    I'm sure you've determined by now that Jules
is acting slightly more cranky than her usual crankypants self and
Christie is doing her woe-is-me, Jules-is-mad routine.
    I told Christie to ignore her, to not take