heart!” She stared at me, anger burning from every inch of her petite frame. “I went to Paris to surprise my sister and found my boyfriend, who was supposed to be in Afghanistan, kissing her! What was I supposed to think?”
“You were supposed to trust us!”
“Trust? Would you have trusted me in the same situation?”
To be honest, I wasn’t sure. I wanted to believe I would have, or that I would have given her a chance to explain. But I didn’t know for sure that that would be the case. You never really know what you’d do in a given situation until you were there.
I shook my head, not sure what to say to her.
“You’re still breaking my heart, you know? She was my sister, the one person who knew me better than I knew myself, the one person I knew better than myself. But you knew more about her than I did.”
“Amy…”
“I lost my sister, but the longer I stay with you, the more I realize that I lost her a long time ago.”
“She loved you. There was never a time I saw her that she didn’t ask about you. You were all we talked about some times.”
“I miss her.”
She said more, but the words were lost in sobs. She wrapped her arms around herself and just crumbled, tears rushing down her face like a river rushing to the ocean, her body shaking with sobs. I went to her, brushed the tears from her face. She buried her head against my chest, her sobs bursting from her lips in hot puffs against my chest. For a long minute she gave in to her grief, sobbing against me as I wrapped my arms around her. But then she pulled away, brushing at her tears with the backs of her hands almost as if she were embarrassed by that normal, healthy show of emotion.
“I need a minute,” she said, waving a hand at me as she strode to the bathroom.
I followed, pulling her back with a hand on her shoulder. She punched me in the chest, a solid punch that hurt more than I cared to admit. She hit me again, another sob slipping from between her lips. And again and again.
I caught her wrists and pushed her back against the wall.
She screamed, struggling against me.
“Stop it, Amy!”
“Let me go!”
“Not until you calm down.”
She pulled against me, trying to free herself, crying out again when I tightened my grip on the wrist bruised by the handcuffs. She pulled down with her arms, then lifted her leg, trying to shove her knee into my crotch. I sidestepped her, maneuvering to the side and pressing my hip into hers.
“You’re hurt. I get it. But you don’t have to do this.”
“You’re an asshole,” she said, trying to buck against me, but I held her too tight. “I hate you.”
“Yeah?” I moved so close that our noses were nearly touching. “Does it make you feel better to admit that?”
“I hate you. I wish I’d never met you.”
“My life would be a lot easier if I’d never met you, too.”
Anger and hurt flashed in her eyes. “But then you wouldn’t have met my sister and become this super spy! Mr. Big Ass, stealing cars and driving to fucking California just for a five-minute conversation!”
“Maybe.”
“If you’d never met me, my sister wouldn’t have gone chasing you to Afghanistan. She would have stayed here and been miserable with me!”
I don’t know how right she was about that. But I knew it was possible. I did know that Emily never even thought about what was happening in the Middle East until I started talking about it.
“Yeah, and I probably wouldn’t have had the courage to join the Army. I wouldn’t have known the woman who made me want to be a better man.” I leaned closer to her. “I wouldn’t have thought of you every minute of every day for the last eight years.”
Pain burst through me, pain that I’d been pushing away, trying to pretend didn’t exist. I watched her eyes, the way she looked at me and remembered what it was like when the only thing in her eyes when she looked at me was love. Now…it hurt to see what the passage of time, what my