Free Follow Me Back by Nicci Cloke Page A

should’ve
known
. All this –’ She waves a hand in the direction of the laptop. ‘I should’ve stopped her.’
    She starts to cry, her hands covering her face as her hair falls forwardsto hide her too.
    I edge my chair round the table and put a hand on her shoulder. ‘Hey,’ I say again. ‘Hey, come on.’
    And then she sort of lurches towards me and buries her face against my shoulder. I put my arms around her back and I listen to her cry. I keep telling her that it’s okay, that it isn’t her fault. I smell the nice, soapy vanilla smell of her, and the last of her coffee, thebuttery teacake. I think about Lizzie. I think about Lizzie ‘hooking up’ with random guys. Drinking at parties. Flirting on screens. I reach behind me and close Marnie’s laptop.
    ‘It’s okay,’ I tell her again. ‘We’ll find her.’
    She pulls back and wipes her eyes with the palms of her hands like a little girl. ‘God, I hope so.’
    ‘Look,’ I say, as she straightens herself out. I really admirehow quickly she does it, how efficiently. ‘Whatever’s happened, you can’t blame yourself. You couldn’t have stopped her.’
    She huffs, like she doesn’t agree.
    I think of the Lizzie I knew, soft and sweet and caring. I think of the Lizzie I saw later: fierce, eyes flashing. Vulnerable, cheeks tear-stained. ‘Lizzie’s complicated,’ I say, uncomfortable. ‘You know that.’
    She lets out a small,hard laugh. ‘Yeah. You could say that.’
    ‘She might get in touch,’ I say, even though the words sound hollow even to me. ‘She might contact you. Or me,’ I add, even though I’d be last on her list.
    ‘Maybe,’ Marnie says, an eyebrow twitching. ‘Maybe she will.’

So how you feeling?
    better now
    It’s been horrible
    yeah you didn’t look the best!
    can’t believe I missed the last show
    did it go well?
    it was fine
    as good as it could be without the star lady in waiting
    haha
    Im so bored
    have you been in bed all this time?
    yeah
    stupid glandular fever
    just been watching tv?
    yeah and sleeping
    sleeping sooooo much
    So are you in Londonnow?
    yep
    at my dad’s
    weird to be back
    aww nice though
    yeah
    saw some old mates tonight, that was cool
    bet they’re glad to see you
    yeah
    When are you off to Spain?
    day after tomorrow
    excited?
    ummm sort of
    it’ll be nice to get some sun
    especially cos ive been in bed for like three weeks!
    but two weeks of Cheska
    :-s
    ahh it’ll be ok
    just hang out with Evie
    yeah
    bless her she’s so excited
    love to be on a beach right now
    yeahhh
    that part is good
    my dad’s place has got a balcony but we can’t fit a chair on it :/
    aww
    So what’s new in old Abs Grey?
    ummm
    Ok
    don’t tell anyone
    what what what???
    cheska got cast in spoilt in the suburbs
    …
    Say something
    …
    come on
    sorry but
    NO WAY
    that is
    …
    Wow
    I know
    i can’t believe she’sdone it
    WHY??
    my parents don’t even care
    they have no idea
    they’ve never seen any of those shows
    hey don’t worry
    she probably won’t get much airtime
    you don’t know her like I do
    she *will*
    Anyway
    whatever! it’s up to her isn’t it
    yeah
    You don’t fancy it then?! lol
    haha no chance
    i’m staying right out of it
    wise choice
    As a serious actress
    ha
    Oh hey, are youstill going for that drama club?
    yeah I think so!
    it’s pretty full on, 2 weeks 9-7 every day
    wow
    that’s great though, you’ll love it
    hope so!
    weird though, by the time holiday and that are done, summer’s almost over
    yeah
    it used to seem so long when we were little
    I know
    like too long to even imagine
    I’m kinda looking forward to going back though
    yeah? how come
    i dunno
    I’ve just got a feeling this year is going to be good
    ;)
    I really wish she’d been right.

S UNDAY. O NE WEEK since the police knocked on the door; one week and one day since Lizzie was last seen. And I keep looking back, all the way back, to when we were just getting to know each other, when everything was fun and