Free 13 Minutes by Sarah Pinborough Page B

They were too old for that shit. Life was too busy. Still, there was a little spark of firefly light buzzing around inside that she couldn’t spit out.
    You’re not a Barbie , a voice from the shadows inside her whispered. Remember that. Remember how they treated you. But still, as she wrote out the thank-you card her mum said she’d drop round the next day, Becca was almost looking forward to Natasha coming back to school.
    That feeling lasted until about 9.05 on Thursday when, while she was unloading her scarf and gloves into her locker, the hive buzz reached her. Oh my god, did you see Hayley’s and Jenny’s bracelets? Aren’t they beautiful? It was another couple of hours before she saw them herself – at break time. She didn’t exactly see them, just the flash of silver accompanied by the jangle of charms and coos of Oh, that’s so lovely, Forever Friends. So sweet! God, you must be so happy she’s okay. You three are so close . . .
    Becca zoned it all out after that. Forever Friends on their charm bracelets. Maybe Natasha actually meant it with those two. She bit her tongue and turned away rather than spitting out that Natasha had once been her best friend forever and look how well that turned out. She didn’t want anyone to see she cared. She didn’t care. Why should she? It was a long time ago. The chess set seemed clunky and stupid now, though. She sure as shit had no intention of using it.
    She snapped at Hannah throughout lunch and then blamed an imaginary period for it when she saw her friend trying to hide her upset. At the end of the day, when the relief of the final bell came at three-fifteen, she went straight to Aiden’s and got massively stoned before having giggly, drowsy sex, trying to keep quiet while his mum cooked tea in the next room. It wasn’t great sex – she wasn’t sure she knew what great sex was yet – but it was warm and close and she enjoyed the sound of his breath getting faster and faster in her ear. It was like she was making him lose control. Her. Becca. Not a Barbie. Just a grungy girl. That made her hotter than any of the rest of it.
    When they were done, he had to go back to Mr McMahon’s to work, even though he’d been there all day, but he drove her home first, the freezing cold air straightening her out a little before she had to deal with her own stiff parents.
    ‘So, Tasha will be at school tomorrow, then,’ he said as the car pulled up.
    She nodded.
    ‘At least everything can get back to normal now.’
    ‘Yeah,’ she said, staring through the windscreen at the snow and ice and clear, dark sky. The glass had barely defrosted on their short trip to her house and ice still cracked the surface where the heaters didn’t touch it properly, framing her view. She wondered how it must have felt to plunge into black freezing water. Like tumbling out into space, your breath slowly being sucked from you. For the first time, she properly wondered what had actually happened to Tasha that night. The police didn’t seem bothered – she hadn’t seen that DI Bennett again – but at the same time, it was still a mystery. Natasha. Always the centre of attention. ‘Yeah, I guess that’s what matters.’
    She thought about smashing the chess set.
     
    *
    ‘ Hey. ’
    Becca had not been looking forward to the auditions and almost didn’t go, only Mr Jones had bumped into her in the corridor at lunchtime, grinning and waving a schedule under her nose and that had been that. Why shouldn’t she go, anyway? She actually liked working on the set and the lighting and making sure everything went smoothly, and this year she’d get to run it. Mr Jones was right. Those things could make or break a show.
    Friday of week one in the school’s two-week timetable was her best day. A double free in the morning meant she got a lie-in, and then she had a free lesson in the afternoon, too. Not having really given the play any thought, she used this to find a quiet corner by a radiator