Desirable

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Book: Desirable by Frank Cottrell Boyce Read Free Book Online
Authors: Frank Cottrell Boyce
as close to the walls as I can. I try to think myself invisible. Today I was not invisible. Today I was totally visible. I was walking in the middle of the hallway, surrounded by girls. I couldn’t help enjoying it, even if I was worried about what they were planning. Maybe a fish thinks the bait tastes nice, even if it does have a hook in it.
    Our homeroom teacher is Mrs. Dudman. In all the years I’ve been at the school she’s only spoken to me once. She said, “Stop talking, George.” Today when I walked in, she looked at me, did that worried-dog type sniff thing that Paula had done, and said, “Hello George, you look nice today. Have you done something different to your hair?”
    I’ve never done anything to my hair. Except wash it after swimming on Wednesdays and after Karate on Sundays. I said, “No,” But no one heard me. They were all discussing the niceness of my hair.
    Tiny Biggs was amazed.
    Things got even more weird in Computers. Mr. Fitton didn’t do the worried dog sniff or make comments about my hair. He told us all to split into groups of three. There are 28 people in my class. Most days if we split into threes it means, nine groups of three and me on my own. Today, he’d just finished talking when Perfect Paula slid her chair in on one side of me and Danielle slid hers in on the other side. Jade came and stood too close to Danielle. “I always work with Paula,” she said.
    â€œYes she always works with me,” agreed Paula.
    â€œI want to work with George,” said Danielle.
    â€œWell, George doesn’t want to work with you, do you, George? Tell her to get lost, George.”
    I turned to Danielle. No way was I going to tell her to get lost. If I’d said anything it would have been, “Please don’t get lost.” But when I opened my mouth, nothing came out. Danielle glared at me, got up and went and sat with Mr. Fitton. I tried to say, “No, wait, come back ...” but that didn’t come out either.

Chapter 3
    How to be Popular with Girls
    The lesson was about making websites. Each group had to design a fan site for a band or a singer, and decide what to put on the front page and how to lay it out. Paula leaned over to Jade and said, “We’re doing a George fan site. It’s called WeloveGeorge and it’s going to have loads of George gossip and George facts on it. George, what’s your favorite color?”
    â€œI don’t really have a favorite color.”
    â€œPut that down. George is open to all colors. Because he looks good in everything. Like that back pack he has – the one that looks like radio-active mustard.”
    â€œYeah.”
    â€œIt’s so cool.”
    â€œMy fluorescent back pack is cool? How come you never said that before?”
    â€œI never really noticed before. Can I take a picture of you?”
    The two of them then started taking pictures of me with their cell phones. By now time was up and Mr. Fitton said, “OK, let’s hear some of your ideas ... Jasmine.” Jasmine’s group was her twin sister, Lily, and another girl and she said, “Our idea was to have a fan site all about George.”
    â€œThat was our idea,” said Paula.
    â€œAnd ours,” said Maddie Yates.
    Every single girl was working on a George Owusu (i.e. Me) fan site. All except Danielle. She – amazingly – was working on a Warhammer site.
    I said, “Warhammer? That’s interesting.”
    â€œNot as interesting as you, George,” said Perfect Paula.
    â€œWe were going to do, like, ‘20 Things You Didn’t know about George’,” said Lucy Begley, “Like his favorite color ...”
    â€œGeorge doesn’t have a favorite color,” said Paula, smugly.
    â€œWell his favorite book then.”
    â€œ
Lord of the Rings
,” said Lucy. “Isn’t that right, George?”
    â€œWell ... I suppose so

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