Free Fable: The Balverine Order (Fable) by Peter David Page B

sense as anything.”
    â€œWe’re eating something that tried to eat us. Guess we had the last laugh.” There were no utensils on the table, so he simply picked up a slice and bit off a piece. More accurately, he pried it off with his teeth. Then he chewed slowly and with a great deal of effort before forcing himself to swallow.
    â€œWell?” Thomas prompted.
    â€œI stand corrected. The beast got the last laugh after all.”
    Suddenly, there was an explosion of noise from upstairs. It was a door slamming open and a big, burly northerner, all bristling beard and cold fury, stomped to the top of the landing and bellowed, “Which one of you bastards did it?”
    Such a challenging declaration was impossible to ignore. Immediately, the men in the main dining hall of the inn were on their feet, and if the northerner was outnumbered by five angry men to one, he didn’t seem especially concerned about it. “I’ll take all of you together! For all I know, you were all in on it!”
    â€œThis isn’t our problem,” James said nervously.
    â€œI’ll go through every one of you and break you apart piece by piece until it’s returned, starting with you!” And he pointed at Thomas and James.
    â€œNow it’s our problem,” said Thomas. He stood and looked at the northerner in what he hoped was a placating manner. “Look, fella, uhm . . . I don’t know what’s going on, but I swear you—”
    â€œHe lost a ring.” It was the hawklike man in the corner who had spoken up. His eyes were now fully opened, and they were glittering with amusement. “About yea large around,” he indicated with his thumb and forefinger, “and a glittering sapphire in the middle.”
    â€œYes! Exactly!” raged the northerner. “And if you stole it, then I’ll—”
    â€œSave your threats. I have taken nothing of yours.”
    â€œThen how do you—?”
    â€œBecause you were wearing it earlier this afternoon. Then you went upstairs to sleep off all the alcohol you consumed during the day, and when you chose to grace us with your presence just now, the ring was no longer on your finger. I assume that you removed it along with other trinkets—”
    â€œI did not!”
    â€œThen it must have slipped off your finger while you slumbered.”
    The northerner was coming down the stairs one shaking step at a time. Each thud sounded like a thunderclap. “If it had slipped off muh finger,” he rumbled, “then I’d have found it on the floor! Or under the bed! But it wasn’t there! I looked! I crawled around on the floor like a damned fool before realizing that one of you lot must have taken it!” He stepped from the bottom stair onto the floor with such force that pans hanging on the wall nearby shook violently. “All I found was this!” and he held up a small, half-eaten biscuit. “Somebody’s idea of a joke, obviously! I’ll show yuh who’s laughing last!”
    â€œDid you lock your door?” James spoke up.
    â€œOf course I did!”
    James continued, “So you’re saying that someone picked the lock on your door hoping that you would be sleeping in there—and would also sleep through them coming in there in the first place—on the off chance that they might be able to find something worth stealing, either right off your hand or maybe being lucky enough to find a valuable trinket lying around on the floor? Come on. Does that make any sense to you?”
    â€œYes!” said the northerner, but he said it with a healthy measure of uncertainty. He hadn’t even managed to convince himself, much less them.
    â€œOkay . . . I’m glad it works for you,” James said, trying the best he could to keep any hint of sarcasm from his voice. The fact was that the northerner could still pick him up and break him in half if he were so inclined.