Free Chased By Fire (Book 1) by D.K. Holmberg Page B

really didn’t understand more than that anyway. Maybe Cobin did. Tan suspected his mother did. But now that the Aeta had departed, it didn’t really matter. It’d be years before they returned.
    “So who did your ma send to help?” Cobin asked. When Tan didn’t answer fast enough, Cobin’s eyes widened. “She sent you? Thought she’s been trying to get you to go to Ethea? Now she sends you the opposite way?”
    “She wants me to serve the king.”
    Cobin took a slow breath and then laughed softly. “That’s what it’s been about with you? Serving? I always thought you just didn’t want to go to the capital. Plenty of folks don’t, especially those who live most of their lives out here, disconnected from everything else. Barely feel like you’re a part of the kingdoms, let alone think you need to go off to the capital to study. But service?” He shook his head. “We all got to serve something. Time you discover what that is.”
    Tan hated the way everyone seemed to know what he needed. “And you? What do you serve?”
    His face took on a serious expression. “I serve plenty. Since her ma died, I keep Bal fed and sheltered.”
    Tan shook his head. Cobin had lost as much as any in Galen. “My mother wants me to study in the universtiy knowing that doing so puts me in debt to the king. Like my father.”
    “And your mother,” Cobin said softly.
    Tan rarely thought of that and wondered how she would repay her debt. Or maybe she already had and never told him about it.  
    Cobin grabbed his shoulder and pulled him off the bed. “I told your pa I’d do what I could to help with you.”
    Tan nodded, swallowing the thick knot in his throat. “I’m sorry, Cobin. I shouldn’t argue with you. I know you’re just trying to help. It’s just…”
    Cobin shook his head. “Don’t need to explain. Sometimes it takes time to know what you want.”
    “That’s just it. I know what I want. And it’s not in Ethea.”
    Cobin’s upper lip curled back in a smile. “So you know what you want?”
    “I want to stay in Nor. It’s comfortable. Home. And it’s the only thing I have left of him.”  
    His voice dropped off as he said the last. He hadn’t really been able to put words to it before. Now that he had, he knew it was probably the biggest reason he didn’t want to go anywhere. Once he left, would he start forgetting the lessons his father had taught him? Would he forget how he’d learned to sense the woods around him, to listen to everything from the wind to the groaning of the trees to the sound of the animals—squirrels and birds and mice—working through the forest, to taste the scents in the air and know when deer passed through or wolves had marked the edge of the territory? Every time he walked through the forest, he felt his father. Once he left, he’d be gone for good. At least staying, he could still remember the deep way his voice sounded, the way he praised him when he got a lesson right, chided him when he forgot something simple—never too harsh. No…Tan couldn’t leave Nor.
    The smile faded. “Not going to be comfortable forever, Tan. Especially if Alles stays as the manor lord. Once that boy of his takes over…”
    Tan shrugged. “Could be years. And by then, maybe I’ll be ready to move on.”
    “Or so settled you can’t go anywhere. Once you put down roots, gets pretty hard to walk.” He shook his head. “Trust me, best to do it while you’re young. At least then you’ll never wonder what you missed.”
    “Like you?”
    Cobin frowned. “I wonder all the time. It’s worth it, though, if she grows up and can have a life of her own.” Tan had never heard so much regret from Cobin before. Cobin sighed. “So are you going to take him?”
    Tan shrugged. “Not much of a choice, is there?”
    Cobin laughed and pushed away from the wall. “Probably not. Forget the king, you can’t risk angering your ma too much.”
    Tan laughed. “Sorry I won’t be able to help you