Free The Case of the Exploding Loo by Rachel Hamilton Page A

LOSERS.
    That’s worse than testing them on animals. Unless you’re an animal. I should tell the police. This might be connected to Dad’s disappearance. They want to test
products on clever people – Dad is a very clever person.
    I have a new theory. Well, a new, improved theory.
    (RECAP)
    THEORY A
    SOMEONE HAS KIDNAPPED DAD
    +
    (RECAP)
    CLUE 10
    The Kazinsky Electronics van is parked outside our house almost every day now.
    +
    (RECAP)
    CLUE 23
    Porter thinks Mr Kazinsky and Ms Grimm are testing electronic devices on LOSERS.
    =
    THEORY B
    MS GRIMM KIDNAPPED DAD TO USE HIM AS THE PERFECT GUINEA PIG FOR MR KAZINSKY’S PRODUCTS.
    I open my mouth to interrogate Porter but Ms Grimm swoops down and whisks him away.

19
Cleverness
    I grab the seat next to Porter in Building Mental Muscle Hour and poke him with my pencil. Ms Grimm glares at me. I give her an apologetic smile and kick her son under the
table.
    “Talk to me,” I hiss. “What’s going on with this place? Why did you bring me here last week? Why was the taxi driver wearing a turquoise bracelet? And why didn’t
you want your mother to know we’d met?”
    “Not now,” Porter murmurs from the side of his mouth as Ms Grimm bangs her ruler on the desk and scans the room for someone to yell at.
    “Just answer three simple questions.” I scribble on his paper:
    1) Where’s my dad?
    2) Was the taxi driver a plant?
    3) What are you hiding from your mother?
    He scribbles underneath, next to a doodle of a portaloo:
    1) No idea
    2) Yes
    3) Not a simple question
    Now stop it! Mother’s watching.
    So I’ve learnt one thing:
    CLUE 24
    The taxi driver was a plant, waiting to pick us up and bring us to LOSERS.
    Does this mean some of my clues aren’t clues at all? I need to talk to Holly. I hadn’t realised how much my conversations with her help me figure things out.
    Ms Grimm raps her stick against the board. “Today, we’re discussing candidates for Cleverest Person in the World. I’ll begin by nominating James Watson, who co-discovered the
DNA double helix structure and believed biotechnology could cure stupidity.”
    My hyperactive brain recalls googling James Watson for a school project.
    “He claimed biotechnology could cure ugliness too,” I remember. “He said, ‘People say it would be terrible if we made all girls pretty. I think it would be
great!’”
    The boys laugh, the girls scowl and Ms Grimm swaps her vote to Marie Curie. I slap my hand over my mouth to stop myself pointing out that since Marie Curie’s been dead since 1934
she’s probably not that clever any more.
    Porter suggests Kate Beckinsale for World’s Cleverest Person. He explains she’s an actress who went to Oxford University but is mainly famous for being a hot vampire in the
Underworld
movies.
    Ms Grimm switches off the Smart Board, snaps her stick and hands out worksheets. But she doesn’t make Porter run up and down the stairs twenty times. Teacher’s pet.
    I stare out the window. We’re on the top floor and I have an almost aerial view of the surroundings.
    Then it hits me. I’ve seen this pattern before.
    To the left is the large square outline of the castle walls. In the far left corner are the turrets of the castle. Behind me are Mum’s favourite shoe shops. I reach into my pocket for the
copy of the map I’ve been carrying around for two months. Finally, it makes sense:

    I peer at the arrows with black circles inside. I have a horrible suspicion someone was trying to draw aerial views of giant high heels.
    X marks the spot.
    CLUE 25
    The ugly picture was guiding me to LOSERS.
    But why? Who sent it? And what “treasure” is marked by that red cross? The more I think about Theory B (Someone has kidnapped Dad to use him as the perfect guinea
pig) the harder it is to believe LOSERS would go to all this trouble just to test electronic products.
    Another theory is forming, based on James Watson’s claims. The ones about intelligence, that is. Not the ones