Free Recipe for Disaster by Miriam Morrison Page B

from dishing out tons of criticism at work if
he thought Jake needed it. Jake did protest, though, when
Maria took his whites away for washing.
    'I can do it myself.'
    'Yes, but I have far more knowledge than you of the best
ways of getting blood out of one's clothes.'
    'Do me a favour and don't ever say that in public,' said
Jake with a grin.
    'I hope you don't mind that my wife fusses over you,' said
Louis rather gruffly one day.
    'Of course I don't – I love her,' said Jake simply. 'It's hard
to explain, but before I met you I thought I had lost
something very precious to me. But you gave it back. I owe
you everything.'
    'You certainly owe me the story of how a gifted young
man like you came here to wash pots. But for now, that
Jerusalem artichoke risotto will not make itself, so what are
you waiting for?'

Chapter Seven
    Nothing went right for Jake in the week before opening
Cuisine. The hotel room cost a fortune; he had finally fallen
asleep in the jacuzzi and woke up in cold water from a
nightmare in which he was trying to cross the Channel in a
pizza oven. Staggering into the bedroom, he found Georgia
fast asleep on the bed with her mouth open, a position only
she could make look adorable.
    The new cooker he'd ordered arrived three days late and
the maniacal youth they'd sent to install it somehow
managed to cause a power failure down the whole street, a
fiasco for which Jake was continuing to apologise every time
he dared set foot outside.
    The first commis chef, who at interview claimed he was
so reliable and keen he would rather cook than eat, sleep
or even have sex, ran away three hours into his first
shift and one of the waitresses sent by the agency seemed
to have a vocabulary of only three words – one of which
was 'fuck'. Luckily, Kirsty, the other one, was hardworking,
willing and only swore in extremis , which was
quite understandable. Her only drawback was a tendency
to tell long, complicated stories about people no one had
ever heard of. By the time Jake had worked out who was
who, he found he had missed the point, if there was one.
    His supplier, who had promised the earth in edible form,
delivered a case of broccoli so old it was practically
mummified.
    'What am I supposed to do with this, cook it or display it
in a museum? Fresh from the fields? You have got to be
joking! It looks like it has come straight from Tutankhamen's
bloody tomb,' Jake snarled.
    The one bright spot was the replacement commis.
    Tess had spiky blonde hair, six piercings in one ear and
a stud through her nose. She was small, thin and tougher
than the broccoli.
    She gave the worst interview Jake had ever experienced,
being practically monosyllabic and radiating waves of such
angry energy Jake had to turn the heating down. She had
left school without any qualifications but with a baby.
Despite this, she had never been out of work.
    Jake didn't care that she was about as chatty as a Trappist
monk. The real issue was, could she cook?
    She bloody could. Not only that, she was organised,
efficient and meticulously neat when she was working. She
might look like her only hobby was biting people in the
neck, but that was fine by him. It was as good a way as any
for dealing with incompetent suppliers.
    The only slight problem was Angelica, her daughter.
Now six years old, Angel, as she was called, was a plump and
gorgeous blonde who combined devastating charm with a
will of iron.
    Tess worked like a Trojan getting set up and even
volunteered to come in on her day off.
    'Trouble is, there's no one to look after Angel.'
    Jake considered this. He knew by now that Tess burned
with a zeal almost as strong as his own. She was a real
kitchen junkie.
    'Well, bring her in, if you want. What trouble can one
small child cause?'
    Tess snorted with derision at the stupidity of men.
    Angel arrived with a pink plastic suitcase, containing
Barbie, Barbie's entire wardrobe and Barbie's pony. The
doll had more clothes than Georgia.
    Angel was quite happy to