Free Happy Hour In Hell: Volume Two of Bobby Dollar by Tad Williams Page B

probably easier than flicking a light switch. Did they just want to remind me how small I was before they stepped on me?
    A part of me, of course, was reminding myself over and over and over again that I should never have tried to lie to the higher angels of the Ephorate.
Hubris
, the Greeks called that. “A dumbshit move,” might be a more contemporary way of putting it.
    Then suddenly I was not alone anymore.
    “Angel Doloriel,” said the light, in the voice of a sweet child. “God loves you.” It took me a moment to recognize the staggeringly beautiful radiance as Anaita, one of the five high angels who’d somehow been appointed to keep me in line, or perhaps to prepare the way for my removal. “I have been sent to deliver the Ephorate’s judgement.”
    I braced myself for whatever was to come.
    “But first . . .” she said, and as she hesitated her light dimmed and wavered just the faintest bit, as if she wanted to say something difficult. I’ve never seen a higher angel show any kind of hesitation before, but I didn’t have long to think about it.
    “But first
,” said another voice,
“you realized you had to wait for the rest of the delegation.”
    Karael appeared in a burst of golden gleaming.
    And now Anaita’s presence definitely guttered. I think I was seeing surprise. That’s something else you don’t expect to see out of any of the higher angels. “Karael?”
    “The Ephorate decided we should deliver the judgement together,” he said, becoming a little less of a glow and a bit more of a human shape, or as human as his heavenly form ever got. “But you left before they had completed their deliberations, Anaita.”
    “I was . . . unaware.” She was flabbergasted was what she was, or at least I’m assuming that’s how it translated. It was a bit like trying to interpret the body language of a G-type star, but she certainly seemed taken aback. What was going on with these two? Was I witnessing a feud? Or something even stranger? It had certainly seemed like Anaita wanted to tell me something.
    “No matter.” Karael spread his fire before me. “The Ephorate continues to be troubled by the events that involve you, Angel Doloriel, but of course the Highest wants only justice. Therefore your judgement has been delayed.”
    I didn’t know whether to be outraged or relieved. “What does that mean, exactly?”
    “It means that we are still concerned, but that other matters are calling for our attention,” said Anaita. She didn’t sound happy about it either.
    Normally I keep my mouth shut as much as possible when I’m in Heaven, and Heaven’s atmosphere of slightly dopey satisfaction makes it easy. But normally, I haven’t just been perforated in all kinds of painful places by some kind of zombie hitman and then jerked upstairs to be scolded. “Hey, I’m concerned too. I’m concerned with why it’s supposed to be my fault that these things keep happening to me.” The best defense and all that. Well, I figured it was worth a try. If they weren’t going to terminate my contract, I didn’t think I’d push them into it just by mouthing off, and if they
were
. . . well, I’d rather vanish from the universal scheme on my feet instead of my knees.
    “Understandable,” said Karael. “That is why we have been given this matter for ephoral judgement, Doloriel, to be certain you are treated fairly. I know you want to go back to work.”
    What I wanted was to be left alone to figure out what crazy shit I was up to my neck in this time, but what I said was, “Yes, of course. That’s just what I want.”
    “But that is just what the Ephorate cannot allow,” Anaita informed me, “at least until we have had time to consider all the complications of this case . . . this . . .
situation
.” She was definitely putting a spin on it, but was it for my sake or Karael’s? “Your work involves you in too many areas we are still investigating, Doloriel.”
    “So what does that mean, my