about you moving in,” I blurted out. Jasper was the one person I could be completely honest with. I didn’t want to start things off with a lie, even a little one.
I glanced up and saw that his face had darkened.
“What did he say?”
I shook my head and reached down to take his hand. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does to me.” He tucked a wayward strand of hair behind my ear.
I sighed. “Short version? He thinks I’m a horrible person for even considering wanting to be with someone after Allen.”
“He doesn’t think that,” Jasper argued. “Your brother loves you. He couldn’t think anything bad about you.”
The muscle in my jaw twitched. “He said my mother would be ashamed of me.”
Jasper swore as he pulled me into his arms again. He kissed the top of my head as his fingers made soothing motions on my back.
“Your brother’s being an asshole,” he said. “Everything you’ve said about your mother tells me that she’d want you to be happy.”
“I think she would’ve liked you,” I said, pressing my face more firmly against his chest. Damn, he smelled good.
“I hope so.”
Jasper sounded sad. I pulled back just enough so I could see his face.
“Are you okay?” I asked. I hoped I hadn’t been so caught up in my own drama that I’d missed something important.
“I never wanted to come between you and your brother,” he said. “Maybe I should just go home.”
“You are home,” I said firmly. “Unless...” My heart sank. “Unless you don’t want to move in. It’s okay if you don’t. You didn’t have to agree...”
He pressed his lips against mine to silence me. It was short, but firm. “I want to live with you,” he said, keeping his mouth close enough to mine for me to feel the heat of his breath. “You have no idea how much I want this.” He rested his forehead against mine. “To wake up next to you every morning. To know that I’m coming home to you every night. It means everything to me.”
“But?” I prompted.
“But I can’t make you choose between your family and me.”
“Jas.” I put my finger on his lips, stopping him before he could say anything else. “You aren’t making me choose. Mitchell is. And if he really loved me, he wouldn’t do that.” I smiled. “Besides, I thought I made it clear that I’ve already chosen. I chose you.”
His eyes closed as I put my hand on his cheek. His skin was smooth. He’d shaved this morning. My stomach tightened at the realization that I’d get to watch him shave in the mornings. That I’d be able to see him standing in the bathroom in front of the mirror, towel around his waist, chest bare...
Damn. I was never going to want to leave the house now.
Chapter 11
Prior to Allen’s death, I’d never actually lived alone. I’d gone from home to college where I’d had a roommate. From college to living with Allen. The longest I’d ever been alone in the house had been for a weekend once when Allen had gone on a trip to see his parents and I’d begged off, citing too many papers to grade. Even for someone who’d been used to living with other people, when I’d first moved in, it had taken me a while to get my bearings and for both of us to learn how to move around each other.
Not this time. It was strange how easily Jasper and I slipped into living together. I’d fully expected things to be awkward, at least for the first month or so, but once we’d finished unpacking on Saturday, it had felt natural to follow a normal routine. Dinner, shower, bed. Waking up next to him on Sunday hadn’t been weird at all. And then last night, instead of worrying about how late he was going to stay since we had to work the next day, we just did the same thing we’d done the night before.
I wasn’t sure if it was because he’d stayed here a couple of times or that we were just already so familiar with each other that we didn’t have to learn each other’s moods, but it was nice not to have to worry about
I glanced up and saw that his face had darkened.
“What did he say?”
I shook my head and reached down to take his hand. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does to me.” He tucked a wayward strand of hair behind my ear.
I sighed. “Short version? He thinks I’m a horrible person for even considering wanting to be with someone after Allen.”
“He doesn’t think that,” Jasper argued. “Your brother loves you. He couldn’t think anything bad about you.”
The muscle in my jaw twitched. “He said my mother would be ashamed of me.”
Jasper swore as he pulled me into his arms again. He kissed the top of my head as his fingers made soothing motions on my back.
“Your brother’s being an asshole,” he said. “Everything you’ve said about your mother tells me that she’d want you to be happy.”
“I think she would’ve liked you,” I said, pressing my face more firmly against his chest. Damn, he smelled good.
“I hope so.”
Jasper sounded sad. I pulled back just enough so I could see his face.
“Are you okay?” I asked. I hoped I hadn’t been so caught up in my own drama that I’d missed something important.
“I never wanted to come between you and your brother,” he said. “Maybe I should just go home.”
“You are home,” I said firmly. “Unless...” My heart sank. “Unless you don’t want to move in. It’s okay if you don’t. You didn’t have to agree...”
He pressed his lips against mine to silence me. It was short, but firm. “I want to live with you,” he said, keeping his mouth close enough to mine for me to feel the heat of his breath. “You have no idea how much I want this.” He rested his forehead against mine. “To wake up next to you every morning. To know that I’m coming home to you every night. It means everything to me.”
“But?” I prompted.
“But I can’t make you choose between your family and me.”
“Jas.” I put my finger on his lips, stopping him before he could say anything else. “You aren’t making me choose. Mitchell is. And if he really loved me, he wouldn’t do that.” I smiled. “Besides, I thought I made it clear that I’ve already chosen. I chose you.”
His eyes closed as I put my hand on his cheek. His skin was smooth. He’d shaved this morning. My stomach tightened at the realization that I’d get to watch him shave in the mornings. That I’d be able to see him standing in the bathroom in front of the mirror, towel around his waist, chest bare...
Damn. I was never going to want to leave the house now.
Chapter 11
Prior to Allen’s death, I’d never actually lived alone. I’d gone from home to college where I’d had a roommate. From college to living with Allen. The longest I’d ever been alone in the house had been for a weekend once when Allen had gone on a trip to see his parents and I’d begged off, citing too many papers to grade. Even for someone who’d been used to living with other people, when I’d first moved in, it had taken me a while to get my bearings and for both of us to learn how to move around each other.
Not this time. It was strange how easily Jasper and I slipped into living together. I’d fully expected things to be awkward, at least for the first month or so, but once we’d finished unpacking on Saturday, it had felt natural to follow a normal routine. Dinner, shower, bed. Waking up next to him on Sunday hadn’t been weird at all. And then last night, instead of worrying about how late he was going to stay since we had to work the next day, we just did the same thing we’d done the night before.
I wasn’t sure if it was because he’d stayed here a couple of times or that we were just already so familiar with each other that we didn’t have to learn each other’s moods, but it was nice not to have to worry about
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