Free Cadillac Cathedral by Jack Hodgins Page B

outside, he saw that a short stumpy man in a red plaid sports jacket and a boater hat was sitting on the running board of the hearse. He stood up when he saw Arvo approach. “This yours?”
    Before responding, Arvo opened the rear door to check that Henderson had actually left a coffin. Solid oak, by the looks of it, with Cynthia’s pots of flowers crammed in the space to one side. When Arvo had admitted to being the driver of the hearse, the boldly dressed man introduced himself as the local realtor Ernie Reynard. “You’ve probably noticed my signs here and there,” he said. “I’vebeen looking for something like this. The perfect vehicle to sit outside my Open Houses with a sign on its roof.” He slapped a dainty hand on the hearse’s hood. “You have no idea how many people slow down for a look but then take off. This’ll get them stopped and out of their cars. And once they’re out of their cars I’ll have ’em. I’ll give you a good price for her — right now, right here.” He brought a wallet out from inside his jacket, as though ready to hand over cash on the spot.
    Arvo laughed and shook his head and climbed in behind the wheel.
    “I can see you’re a man who drives a hard bargain,” the realtor said, stepping up onto the running board and taking hold of the steering wheel with one hand. “I’ll even consider trading you a year-old Lexus for it. Crazy I know, but it’s my boy’s car and he’s gone off to university and don’t want it any more.” He gestured towards the maroon four-door sedan parked across the street, a giant sign on its roof: REYNARD REALTY , Homes for your Future . “You better accept the offer before I come to my senses.”
    Arvo started the engine. “I have a suspicion,” he said, “that a hearse may not be the best advertisement for Homes for your Future . Your message could be misunderstood.”
    “Dammit,” the man said. He stepped down from the running board and trotted along beside the moving hearse. “All right then, you will let me be your sponsor for this journey — wherever it is you’re going. I’ll pay for all the gas this machine will burn and I’ll be your escort as well. You have no idea how much business this will bring in when people see my company sign on this lovely artefact from the past.”
    He did not wait to hear Arvo’s response to this, but climbed into his son’s Lexus and swung around to pass by and pull up in front of the Henry J, which had already begun to move out onto the road. Itseemed that Arvo had little choice but to follow, though the sight of Cynthia hurrying towards him while waving her arms made him wonder if he had misunderstood her intentions.
    When he’d brought the hearse to a stop, he said, “You changed your mind?”
    But she stopped where she was and shook her head. “I just wanted to let you know I haven’t changed my mind. In case you started to worry. It was jealousy made me want to go with you. I couldn’t stand being left out while you boys go off and have an adventure. But of course I was a fool. I’ll stay home and bake for the funeral.”
    “This isn’t just because I wouldn’t take you to California?”
    She cocked her head to one side to think. “Well. California could’ve made a difference. But as you said, we mightn’t live long enough to get there in this .” She pressed both hands to her ears when she laughed — always had done, as though she didn’t want to hear herself.
    “Your sister’ll drive you back to your car?”
    She’d tilted her hands out far enough to hear. “Don’t worry. She owes me several lunches and at least half-a-dozen drives.”
    As he moved slowly through the last few blocks leading out of town, Arvo could see in his mirror that Cynthia had remained standing in front of the restaurant, watching them depart. But as she grew smaller in the mirror he became aware that he had already accumulated a few followers who seemed uninterested in getting past. By the time he