Willed to Love

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Authors: Michelle Houston
willpower, she told him she would be gathering her things and meeting him at the house in a few days, where they would begin their three months together.
    “I’ll drive you.”
    “Devon, I—” Her voice cracked and she had to take a deep breath, then another, and another. His hand, so firm and gentle, settled on her shoulder, silently offering her comfort that she wasn’t sure she could handle. She just wanted to get away from everyone and lick her wounds.
    “I need some time. This is a lot to take in, and I just need some time alone.”
    “I—” Now it was his turn to pause and clear his throat. “I didn’t ask Nana to do this, but I’m glad she did. I’ve missed you Ash.”
    They stood silently for a few moments before the warmth of his hand left her shoulder and she could hear the soft thud of his steps down the hallway, moving away from her. Forcing one foot in front of the other, she headed in the other direction, not stopping until she was in her car.
     
    * * * *
     
    It only took her two days to gather her things and put most of her affairs in order for a three month leave. Her boss was pissed, to say the least, but given Devon’s family’s influence, he wasn’t about to cause her any problems. So her leave was considered bereavement time, and they were leaving it at that.
    As she pulled into the drive leading up to Mrs. Monroe’s house, she couldn’t help reflecting how she had come full circle. Almost six years before she had driven up this path for the first time. She had worked at a catering service at the time, and was part of the staff brought in for a fall party launching the political career of one of ‘ the grandchildren’ , as Devon’s grandmother referred to them. Never by name, except Devon.
    A few hours in, the old lady had cornered her and ordered her to keep her company. Her feet killing her, thanks to the high heels she had worn to counter her five foot five frame, Ashley had been more than grateful for the excuse to sit down for a while. It was while they had been discussing philosophy that Devon had gone looking for Nana, and found her sitting in the corner of her library giggling like a school girl with Ashley.
    Sparks had flown, and not good ones either. Her heart raced just remembering facing him down, his six foot frame dwarfing her as he demanded to know what she wanted with his grandmother. Temper flaring, she had fired back that if he hadn’t left her to seek companionship from strangers, he would have a better ability to watch over her.
    As she pulled up to the house, she could almost hear Devon’s voice suddenly changing from confrontation to admiration, and then he had asked her out. Of course she had turned him down, which had started their whirlwind courtship that finally cumulated with their marriage a year later.
    A little over six months later, she had wanted out. Not out of Devon’s life, but out of the cycle his family had fallen in to. She had spent every waking moment being groomed to be a socially acceptable wife, and failed on all counts. She laughed too loud. She cried in public. She wore clothing with too much color and not enough style. She actually dared to laugh in a senator’s face. All sins in the Monroe’s eyes.
    Feeling her whole body trembling, Ashley climbed out of the car and gently closed the door. She desperately wanted to jump back into the car, slam in behind her and peel rubber all the way back down the driveway; because she had just noticed Devon standing in the shadows, watching her. Running a hand through her riot of curls, she tried to tame her red locks without much success as she walked across the drive and up the stairs.
    As she reached the porch, uncertainty clawed at her. What should she do? He was still her husband, but they had been waiting out the separation requirements until they could file for divorce. Two months they hadn’t spoken too each other, except through lawyers and his grandmother. Yet the love was still there,

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