Free Lost and Found by Megan Fields Page B

from him, shaking my head, but his arms tighten around me.
    “Ella, please talk to me. It’s killing me that you’re hiding things from me.” He cups my face in his hands and looks me in the eye. “Please. Was it me? What happened between us after I left? I regret it every day and if I could change it I would.” His eyes search mine, pleading with me to talk. I can’t let him think it’s because of him.
    I sigh. “We need to talk.” He nods and follows me to the sofa. Sitting next to me, he places his hand on my knee, waiting for me to start. I can’t look him in the eye, so I fixate on his hand - using it as an anchor to focus on.
    I take a deep breath, “Jack when I was twenty I started dating a man named Eric.” His hand tenses on my knee. “We dated for six months and a part of me was in love with him. We were like any normal couple in the early stages of a relationship and couldn't keep our hands off each other.”
    “Ella...” His voice sounds strained.
    “Please let me finish, and then it will all become clear.” I sneak a glance at him and he nods. “Eric wanted to be more adventurous, shall we say, in the bedroom and we experimented.” I feel his whole body tense now, but I have to keep going. “One day he went a little too far and was way too rough, so I told him. We went back to normal sex after that, but over the next few weeks he slowly started to verbally abuse me. He’d always brush off his comments though and so would I, figuring he’d just had a bad day at work or something. I guess I never wanted to believe that he would intentionally hurt me.” Taking another deep breath, I continued. “I started to ignore the comments he made toward me and tried not to let it show that he was upsetting me, but that only made him take things a step further. He started to push me around. He never outright hit me, but would make sure I got knocked into things, like the corner of the dresser, or the coffee table. He would make a joke of it and call me clumsy, but I knew better. One day I came home from work and he kicked off big time, shouting at me and shoving me about. He struck me across the face and I told him I was leaving him.” Jack stood up and started to pace back and forth. I had lost his hand that was anchoring me and I focused on my own hands in my lap. “I went to our room to pack the few things I had there and he grabbed me from behind.” The memory of that moment floods me and I stop for a moment to control my emotions. Jack’s standing looking out over the park opposite my apartment, with his fists clenched at his sides. “Eric forced me down on the bed, tied me up and gagged my mouth. Then left me alone for hours not returning until the evening, where he simply got in bed and went to sleep as if I weren’t even there. In the morning he untied me from the bed, my hands and feet still tied together and helped me to the bathroom. I decided not to struggle in case he lashed out and once back in our room he left me again for a few more hours. When he came back, he... he raped me. It happened twice on the first day and three times on the second day, but on the third day, he wasn’t alone.” Jack whirled round to look me in the face. I hadn't realised that I’d starting sobbing and the next thing I knew he pulled me across his lap into an embrace.
    “Shh Ella, I'm here. No one can hurt you.” He cooed to me and rocked me until I calmed down, holding me; making me feel safe.
    “I need to finish Jack.” He stays silent, holding me tightly in his arms. “Eric had brought one of his friends with him and he let him... he let him rape me.”
    “Fuck!” I look up at Jack whose eyes are full of rage. “Is there anymore?” I nod and he closes his eyes, as he strokes my hair gently and continues to rock me.
    “On the last day Eric went out for a while, but his friend came back for more. He had a knife Jack.” I kept my eyes open, not wanting to close them for fear of seeing my