were filled with titles I could not make outâGerman, I assumed, from the lettering. On the wall was a carefully printed family tree, Leda's name listed just above Sarah's.
No television, no phone, no VCR. No Wall Street Journal sprawled across the couch, no jazz CD humming in the background. The house smelled of lemon wax and was warm to the point of suffocation. My heart began to pound in my chest. What had I gotten myself into?
âLeda,â I said firmly, âI can't do this.â
Without responding, she sat down on the couch, a nondescript brown corduroy with lace antimacassars. When had I last seen those?
âYou have to take me back with you. We'll figure something out. I can come here from your place every morning. Or I can have an ex parte meeting with the judge to find an alternative.â
Leda folded her hands in her lap. âAre you really so afraid of them,â she asked, âor is it just that you're afraid of yourself?â
âDon't be ridiculous.â
âAm I? Ellie, you're a perfectionist. You're used to taking charge and turning things to your own advantage. But all of a sudden you're stuck in a place that's as foreign to you as a Calcutta bazaar.â
I sank down beside her and buried my face in my hands. âAt least I've read about Calcutta.â
Leda patted my back. âHoney, you've dealt with Mafia bosses, even though you aren't part of the Mob.â
âI didn't move in with Jimmy âthe Boarâ Pisano while I was defending him, Leda.â
Well, she had nothing to say to that. After a moment she sighed. âIt's just a case, Ellie. And you've always been willing to do anything to win a case.â
We both looked into the kitchen, where Katie and Sarahâ relatives of mine, once removedâstood side by side at the sink. âIf it was just a case, I wouldn't be here.â
Leda nodded, conceding that I'd gone out of my wayâand realizing that she should go out of hers. âAll right. I'll give you some ground rules. Help without being asked; Plain folks put lots of store in what you do, and less in what you say. It won't matter to them that you don't know anything about farming or dairyingâwhat counts is that you're trying to lend a hand.â
âForget farmingâI know nothing about being Amish .â
âThey won't expect you to. And there's nothing you need to know. They're folks like you and me. Good ones and bad ones, easygoing ones and ones with tempers, some quick to help you out and others who'll turn the other way when they see you coming. Tourists, they see the Amish as saints or as a sideshow. If you want this family to accept you, you just treat them like regular people.â
As if the recollection had hurt her, she stood suddenly. âI'm going to go,â Leda said. âAs much as Aaron Fisher dislikes having you here, he dislikes having me here even more.â
âYou can't leave yet!â
âEllie,â Leda said gently, âyou'll be fine. I survived, didn't I?â
I narrowed my eyes. âYou left.â
âWell, one day you will too. Just keep remembering that, and the day will be here sooner than you think.â She tugged me into the kitchen, where the conversation abruptly stopped. Everyone glanced up, slightly puzzled, it seemed, to find me still there. âI'm going to take off now,â Leda said. âKatie, maybe you could show Ellie your room?â
It struck me: this is what children do. When relatives come to visit, when friends of their own arrive, they take them into their own territory. Show off the dollhouse, the baseball card collection. Reluctantly, Katie forced a smile. âThis way,â she said, starting for the stairs.
I gave Leda a quick, tight hug, and then turned toward Katie. I squared my shoulders and followed her. And no matter how much I wanted to, I did not let myself look back.
66
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As I walked behind Katie,