in frustration before looking at me again. His voice was calmer as he spoke this time. “Please, just dry yourself off and then come to me when you are ready.” With that, he left the cabin and slammed the door behind him.
I was left speechless.
I quickly dried off and changed into my nightgown. I sat on the window seat, once again yearning to return home even though for now it wasn’t possible. Going back on deck to find Aiden wasn’t something I was ready to do yet. I felt angry and confused, unattractive and lonely. So lonely I was becoming a part of Aiden’s world and letting him lure me into a false sense of security. This boat wasn’t my home. The ocean was. It had all been a mistake, to make a move on Aiden and try to give him what he wanted. He was the one in charge, not me. He made it clear several times before, and I supposed it included relationships with the opposite sex. I wasn’t okay with that.
But Goddess I was so very intrigued with just the thought of his lips on mine. I couldn’t seem to shut off those thoughts or think of anything else. Aiden took over my mind like the sight of gold, and I was determined to blame the rum. I will never drink it again.
Leaning back on the wall, I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to steady myself. I had to calm down, get a hold of myself, so I could refocus on how I could ever escape. That had been my goal, not to sit around and spend time with the one who took me hostage, but it hadn’t worked out that way. The ocean was supposed to keep me safe when I jumped. My voice should have called out to my people to save me. The plan had failed. Everything mermaid about me was gone.
I had given it up to remain alive. The moon took my fins, my night vision, and my ability to speak or breathe under water. I began to fear she took everything from me. What if I could no longer heal others? What if…what if I was stuck as a human and my wishes upon the moon no longer worked? None of my people wished to be human or have legs since we were driven to the sea. It was possible our magic didn’t work the same anymore. I could be stuck as a human.
The tears began to fill up my eyes, even though I wiped desperately at them with my hands. I couldn’t cry here and now. It wasn’t the time. I couldn’t be weak. I needed to be strong, but the thought of never seeing my family hurt so bad I almost couldn’t breathe. What would become of me? I couldn’t stay a human, couldn’t be trapped in this awful body with legs.
A hard pounding on the door snapped me out of my thoughts.
“Rae?” Aiden’s voice came from the other side.
“Go away!” I called, hoping he’d do as I asked. I couldn’t let him see me on the verge of hysterical tears.
“I need to speak with you. This is my quarters if you will remember.”
“Not now!” I exclaimed.
He grew quiet for a moment before he responded. “Are you okay in there?”
I didn’t answer, hoping if I didn’t, he would give up and leave. Let him think I was dying in there; I didn’t care. After a few moments of precious silence, I thought he left. Then, Aiden pushed the door open and then slammed it behind him. He picked the lock.
“What are you doing in here?” he demanded as he stomped over to where I was.
“I—uh—”
“I thought you would come and join me when you were dry. Are you alright?” His eyes were confused but worried. His demeanor showed he was truly concerned about me, different from when he stormed off. I was under the impression that he didn’t care about me in any way except for a conquest. His actions tonight made me wonder otherwise—wonder if all our flirting was really harmless. There was something about him that didn’t align with all a pirate should be, and clearly there was more to him than what his reputation showed. He’d saved me, with no reason to.
“Yeah I’m fine.” My words were a lot nicer than I suspected, thrown off by the way he was acting.
“Well then,” he