Free In the Spinster's Bed by Sally Mackenzie Page B

sprawled next to him.
    “Only one glass?” His hand shook just a little as he took it from her.
    “I don’t drink.”
    “Never? Come, sit down.” He scooped Poppy up and put her on his lap. Surprisingly, Poppy didn’t protest.
    “Hardly ever.” She perched on the edge of the settee. This was probably closer than she should be to him now. It was one thing to be brave. It was quite another to be stupid. “Has it gone bad?”
    William tasted it. “No. It’s quite good, actually.” He held the brandy out to her. “Here. Try a little.”
    “All right.” She took a cautious sip. Warmth filled her mouth and slid down her throat. The tight, nervous feeling in her stomach began to ease. She took another sip.
    She already felt a bit fearless.
    Or perhaps it was reckless.
    “Good?”
    She nodded and glanced down at Poppy. Blast it, Poppy looked very snug and content and blissful with William’s strong fingers rubbing her ears. It made her—
    Good God, I’m jealous of a cat .
    William spread his free arm out along the back of the settee. “There’s no need to sit on the edge of the seat like that, Belle. Come closer.” He smiled faintly. “You don’t have to be afraid of me.”
    “I’m not afraid of you.” I’m afraid of myself.
    She slid next to him, and then his arm pulled her even closer, so she was pressed against his side. It felt wonderful. She relaxed even more.
    They sat that way for a while and then William broke the silence.
    “I realized, as I watched Hortense die, Belle, how much to blame I was for her suffering.”
    She stiffened. What? William could not think himself at fault! “No. I read about her, er, activities in the gossip columns. You didn’t force her to go to those awful parties or to behave in such a scandalous manner.”
    He sighed. “In a way I did. I was neither kind nor understanding, especially at the beginning of our marriage, when it might have made a difference. If I had only—”
    She put her fingers on his lips, stopping him. “No. You are giving yourself too much credit. Each of us chooses our own path. Surely not every London lady with an unkind husband lives a notorious life.”
    He frowned. “I should have done better.”
    “We all have regrets, things we’d do differently if we had the opportunity. You were very young when you married.”
    Do I regret what I did with William all those years ago?
    No. Even with the pain and the loss, I’d not change a thing.
    “I was nineteen,” William said. “Nineteen is quite old enough to ruin one’s life.”
    “You did not ruin your life. It just went in a direction you hadn’t planned.” As hers had. “You learned things you wouldn’t have learned had you made different choices.”
    He snorted.
    “William, the past can’t be changed. We can only live in the present.”
    William is here, and he is no longer married. I can comfort him, and he can comfort me.
    She rested her head against his shoulder, breathing in his scent. William. The only times in her entire life that she hadn’t felt alone were the times she’d spent with him.
    Need swirled low in her stomach.
    He brushed his lips across her forehead. “Tired?”
    “Mmm. I think I’d like to go to bed.”
    Poppy blinked at her, and then jumped off William’s lap to run up the stairs.
    “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” William stood and pulled her up. “Thank you for listening.”
    She wrapped her fingers around his wrist. “Don’t go.”
    He frowned. “What do you mean?”
    “I mean I want you to stay with me tonight. If you want to, that is. If you’re ready to.” She stroked his cheek. “I want to love you.”
    And then she stretched up to kiss him on the mouth.
     
     
    Zeus! The touch of Belle’s lips sent need flashing through him like lightning, followed immediately by a thunderous boom of lust. He pulled her up against his—
    No.
    He didn’t want her to think this was what he had come to her for. He’d sought her out not to ease his