Free Kissed by Reality by Carrie Aarons Page A

letting Julian film with me, he'd go off like a loose cannon. That's not how they wanted to play my storyline, so it looked like I'd be drowning my sorrows in Cabernet tonight.
    I was halfway through my second glass when I heard Erin giggle out on the patio. I snuck to the window overlooking that part of the yard, and my stomach plummeted like I'd just crested the first drop on a roller coaster.
    Finn's hands were threaded in her mahogany hair, his lips pressed sweetly to hers as they embraced under the moonlight. His eyes were closed, his expression peaceful.
    I turned and walked away quickly, trying my hardest not to dry-heave all over the expensive piece of clothing draped around my body. I stopped when my back hit the stairwell wall, my knuckles almost white as they clenched the wine glass between them. It would break if I didn't get my hurt, anger and panic under control.
    My cool girl act was slipping. I'd come here assuming the notion that I'd lure him back to me with wit, casual flirting and a hard-to-get attitude. Only then would I tell him I was still in love with him, that the reality TV darling had ceased to exist the minute he'd picked me in Bermuda. That the only thing I wanted to be now was his wife, a part of his family. And it was true. Maybe I'd wanted the fame and the attention, but that had all vanished the minute Finn got down on one knee. I'd seen my future flash before my eyes, and I wanted to seize it.
    Except this mission, the plan I'd so carefully constructed, it wasn't working. He wasn't enticed by my flippant attitude or quiet beauty. He wasn't falling for any of the tricks I threw at him, because he wasn't even interested in coming within ten feet of me. I was losing him, and fast. He was meeting women here, women who were thousand times more successful, sincere and kind than I was. Women from small towns, who knew how he’d grown up and would never get bored. While I'd been the one to tell him four months ago that while I loved spending time in Nebraska, I needed adventure. And he'd agreed because it was part of my package.
    But now Finn didn't want in on that. And I needed a new plan.
    "Don't give up just yet." A quiet voice rose up from the bottom of the winding staircase, and I peeled my back off the wall to see Carter rounding it.
    I tried to swipe the errant tear that was leaking down my cheek, but I don't think I was quick enough.
    "You did a shitty thing, and you broke his heart. But I have a feeling you're also the only one who can put it back together."
    Carter's words made the lump in the back of my throat grow, practically suffocating me with emotion. It all came lashing out at me like a whip. Breaking Finn's heart, my mother's cancer, being here, playing into Chuck and Mitchell's asinine game once again. I needed a minute.
    I don't know if I really even acknowledged Carter before I walked up the stairs, but he must have known I didn't want him to follow me. For playing the dumb, loyal, funny brother all the time, Carter hid that he was oddly intuitive.
    I must have been leaning against the edge of the bathroom sink, doing deep breathing exercises for longer than I thought because Finn came tearing into the room like a bull that had seen red.
    "It’s not good enough that you're fucking up this entire experience for me, but you're going to hold up filming as well?!"
    His face was crimson, his pupils dilated with rage. I'd seen him this mad before, when the beast that had taken root inside of his soul overseas managed to carve its way out. The only option was to get out of its way.
    "I didn't realize, I'm sorry. Let's go down now."
    "What, you figure you're just going to boycott even coming to Charm Ceremonies anymore because you know you're hanging around until production lets me kick your ass to the curb?"
    I could hear the fuse of my anger slowly ticking down, burning away until at any moment I would explode. "Finn, watch it..."
    "Fuck Leighton, shut up! This? It was supposed to be