idiot, donât you get it?â
âThis might go better if you were more restrained,â I said.
âRestrained? Youâre lucky I donât throw you out.â
âOne of us is,â I said.
âWhat the fuck does that mean?â Eisen said.
I took a deep breath, but it was too late. I found myself standing.
âIt means that if you donât settle down Iâm going to stick your foot in your ear,â I said.
He took an involuntary step backward and realized he had, and tried to compensate.
âYou want to try it,â he said in a commanding voice.
âOh, you men,â Ellen said. âYouâre just overgrown boys.â
âTrue,â I said. âBut itâs worth keeping in mind that Iâm about thirty pounds more overgrown than your husband.â
I looked at Bernie for a moment.
âAnd, I would guess, four inches taller.â
âYou think I canât handle myself?â Bernie said.
âYouâve probably been handling yourself too much,â I said.
Ellen giggled. I think we were both startled.
Bernie said, âEllen, for Godâs sake.â
Ellen said, âWell, it was kind of funny. And, Bernie, get real. Look at him. Heâs much too big and strong.â
âThank you,â I said.
She smiled at me and said, âYouâre welcome.â
âOkay, okay,â Bernie said. âWeâll let it go for now.â
âWhew,â I said.
âBut I want to know your scam.â
âSomebody spiked your open-marriage poster boy three times in the head.â
âOpen marriage?â Bernie said.
âDarrin and I explained our arrangement to Mr. Spenser,â Ellen said.
âI would have thought it was none of his business,â Eisen said.
I thought he had a point.
âOh, arenât you funny?â Ellen said. âDarrin felt it was the right thing to do. You know perfectly well that a relationship cannot be truly open if we are not truly open about it.â
Eisen nodded.
âI know, darling. I know.â
He looked at me.
âAll the more reason that your story doesnât hold water. In a relationship like ours, thereâs nothing to hide. Why would someone follow either one of us.â
âMy question exactly,â I said.
âWell, my man,â Eisen said to me. âIf your story isanything but some sort of clumsy attempt to extort money, then I guess youâll have to talk with Steve Gavin. I know nothing about any of this, and Iâm sure Ellen doesnât either.â
âI donât,â Ellen said, âreally.â
It was quite possible that they didnât. But Bernie knew it had happened. It would have been forcefully explained to him by Gavin, the moment after I left Gavinâs office. It had almost certainly also been explained that his mouth should remain firmly shut on the matter. Which it would until I had something to pry it open with. I finished the last of my scotch and soda and put the glass down, centering it on the coaster. Tough guy like Eisen, you couldnât be too careful.
âThanks for your time,â I said.
Eisen didnât say anything.
Ellen stood and said, âIâll walk to the door with you.â
After she closed the door behind me and while I was waiting for the elevator, I put my ear against the door. But I couldnât hear anything. Maybe there was nothing to hear. Maybe in open marriage you didnât get too attached to your non-spousal partner. Ellen had shown no sign that Trent Rowleyâs death made any difference to her. I wondered if sheâd mourn Bernie. Or Darrin OâMara. Maybe in open marriage you didnât get too attached to anybody. Easy come, easy go. Maybe open marriage was a crock. In the elevator, going down, I decided that it was.
21
N o one was in the office at 9:15 in the morning when I showed up at the Templeton Group. No one arrived. I called them on my cell
J.A. Konrath, Bernard Schaffer