Free The Ballerina and the Revolutionary by Carmilla Voiez Page A

do we really know that either? It was just something Clive said. I haven’t read anything in her letters or diaries about him yet.’
    ‘Would you look again, for me, tomorrow? Please? I need to know ... if he was ... involved.’
    Chrissie frowned and shrugged.
    ‘Don’t ask me why,’ I begged.
    ‘Okay ... sure. Look, I better get to bed. If you’re okay, of course. I really need some zees ... Hey, did you phone your brother?’
    I blushed and closed the book. ‘I forgot.’
    She laughed softly and shook her head.
    ‘I’ll do it tomorrow,’ I said, yawning. ‘It’s too late now. Sleep sounds good. G’night, Chrissie.’
    ‘Goodnight, Crow. Sleep well.’
     

 
     
     
    19
     
    Sleep came swiftly. Dark, chilled water surrounded me. Above me I saw a circle of light. Below, giant snake-like reeds reached towards me. The teenage Vivienne, the one I had seen in the bath, swam ahead of me. Her long hair floated around her face like seaweed. She opened her mouth, as if to speak, and bright green bubbles escaped her lips. Scott’s face looked down at us from a circle of light at the surface. His mouth opened and shut, like a drowning fish and, although I couldn’t hear his words, he looked as though he was trying to tell me something important. Fearful, I dived deeper, into the shadowy depths, brushing past the reeds. Their knife-like edges sliced into my bare skin. Vivienne and Scott vanished, and I tried to rise but couldn't. Tugging and kicking at plants coiled around my ankles, I struggled to break free. Snakes weaved through the aquatic jungle, moving closer and closer. I sat up and gasped, dragging air into my lungs. Sweat chilled my skin as I pulled the duvet that bound my legs.
     
    I rubbed my forehead, stretching the skin upwards with aggressive strokes. The light in the room had a grey pre-dawn softness to it. I paced to the window, clutching my tobacco tin, its rich smell refocused me. The flare of my lighter and the nicotine hit of my first inhalation reminded me of Scott, although I didn’t understand why. I considered my dream. Its meaning should have seemed clear, but I fought it. I fought against vulnerability. I didn’t want to open myself up, care about Vivienne or Scott. I feared being hurt again.
    The hairs on the back of my neck prickled as I sensed someone was watching. I turned away from the window and looked around the room. No-one was there. Turning slowly, I peered out of the window and saw an old woman looking up at me, frowning.
    ‘Nanny?’
    I stared at the grey-haired woman, standing just outside the garden gate. The upturned face reminded me of my dead grandmother in the half-light. Afraid to break eye contact, I leaned out of the window. The figure appeared startled and scuttled away behind a neighbouring wall.
     
    ***
     
    The door-chime woke me at ten. My head still full of the echoes of sleep, I lay in bed, listening to male and female voices chat in the hallway below. My room was warmed by the sunlight pushing its way through the curtains. Pulling myself up, I shook the stupor from my brain.
    The kitchen door stood open. I heard Chrissie explain to Tomas and Catherine, how delicate I was; they shouldn't push me too hard. Furious, I strode across the hallway.
    Tomas turned to face me. ‘G’morning, Sis. Sleep well?’
    ‘Sure,’ I lied, not wishing to be cross-examined about the night’s events.
    ‘We’re going to the hospital again today. Would you like to come with?’
    Chrissie passed me a cup of steaming black coffee and a rolled cigarette. I squeezed the roll-up between tight lips and leaned forward so Chrissie could light it. Everyone was watching me.
    I inhaled then exhaled. ‘Sure.’
     

 
     
     
    20
     
    Vivienne’s soft, grey eyes opened as I approached the bed. I offered her a friendly smile that made my skin feel cold.
    ‘Hello, Vivienne,’ I whispered.
    Tomas nudged my arm. ‘Hi, Mum.’ His bright smile lit up the room and Vivienne’s eyes