Free The Search by Iain Crichton Smith Page A

ask for a loan till he got back to Canberra? Alternatively he might go to the police and report his loss. But some instinct made him decide against that. If he went to the police they might make him stay in Sydney while they questioned him. He simply wished to get out of Sydney and go back to his own room in the college: his mind ached with the desire to do so. He thought of Canberra and not Glasgow as his home.
    As he made his way towards the Salvation Army offices, he no longer worried about his brother: his more immediate concern was to save his own skin. Had he not done enough? What more could be expected of him? Anyway he no longer believed that his brother was alive and if he was he couldn’t be in any worse condition than he was himself. Thinking these thoughts he found himself at his destination. He stood in front of the window of a shop and tried to straighten his tie. Then very slowly he climbed the stairs to the office.
    Mrs Tennant was there, matronly, composed and calm.
    â€œMr Grierson,” she said in surprise. “I’m sorry but we don’t have any more news.”
    He stared at her, at first unable to speak. Then he said, speaking very carefully, for he found that his voice was actually trembling.
    â€œI came to ask you for money.”
    He tried to smile in a civilized manner as if he was making a joke but the muscles of his face were stiff.
    â€œI went to a Home that Douglas told me about and when I was in a house to which I was directed by an inmate I was hit over the head. My wallet was stolen, all the money I had. Can you give me some money to take me back to Canberra? I would repay you, naturally.”
    â€œWhat?” she said. “You were beaten up. You must inform the police at once.”
    â€œNo,” he said, “I don’t wish to do that. All I want is to get back to Canberra. I’m tired of all this. I don’t know what’s been happening to me since I came to Sydney.”
    â€œI think first of all you should have a cup of tea,” she said, briskly efficient. “I’ll ring.” She did so and when a young girl came into the office she asked if she could bring some hot sweet tea through.
    â€œNow tell me what happened,” she said, when the girl had gone.
    â€œI went along to that Home,” said Trevor. “I met a man there and he told me that he knew my brother. He sent me along to another house.”
    â€œHave you got the address?”
    He put his hand into his pocket without thinking and then recollecting what had happened to him said, “How stupid of me. I’m afraid I haven’t, I had it on a piece of paper in my pocket. I certainly don’t want to go back there.”
    â€œI think you should report this to the police. Shall I do it?”
    â€œNo I won’t bother. I still have my passport and my air ticket back to Glasgow. I don’t want to stay here in Sydney. I want to go back to Canberra.” The image of his brother which had once shimmered like a mirage in a desert had now faded from his mind.
    â€œAre you feeling all right?”
    â€œYes, I’m feeling all right. Just a little pain in my head but it will go away. I’m angry at my own stupidity. I shouldn’t have listened to that man, who told me about my brother. Can you give me enough money to pay my bus fare back to Canberra? That’s all I need. Of course it would only be a loan.”
    â€œOf course I can loan you the money,” she said.
    â€œI shall send it back,” Trevor insisted. “I shall definitely send it back. If you will give me the address of this office. I’ve got money in the bank in Canberra. You’ve been very good to me.”
    She handed him 30 dollars and a card with the address.
    â€œThat should be enough,” she said. “But what about meals?”
    â€œI don’t want a meal,” he said. “All I want is enough money to pay for the bus. I shall stay in the