standing outside of the private room. I’m losing my nerve and thinking about making a run for it, knowing James is in there. I could get away quickly and easily and not have to deal with this tonight. No, I tell myself, just get it over with, like ripping off a bandage. I take a deep breath for courage and put my hand on the doorknob, hoping that I don’t lose the first job EPOM has gotten.
I’ m pacing like a caged animal in this room. After the bouncer told me that I was going to get to talk to Vixen, I calmed down a little. I’m still reeling from the knowledge that my newest contract employee is also a stripper. It just doesn’t make sense. Sure, she’s absolutely fucking gorgeous, which is somewhat rare in this industry, but that’s not all. If I really think about it, I knew there was something different about her last time I saw her. Some of the pieces are falling into place, but I still have more questions than answers. The top one being what the fuck is a computer genius doing in a crappy strip club?
I check my watch for the hundredth time but only ten minutes has passed. I’m starting to feel caged in, and that usually gets my blood boiling. If she doesn’t show up soon I’m going to go find her. I’m not leaving here without the answers I need.
I stop pacing when I hear the door knob turn, spinning around to face her when she walks in. But, the door never opens. I’ll give her a few more seconds then I’m going to pull some caveman shit and pull her in here. I count to ten and when the door fails to open, I stalk over and practically rip it off its hinges. I’m shocked to find the hallway empty.
“Son of a bitch,” I yell at the wall. I take off toward the front of the club, hoping to catch her before she bolts. Once I get to the main room, the crowd has grown and there’s no clear path to the door. I start shoving people out of my way, not really giving a fuck if anyone is pissed off. Most people don’t challenge me because of my size so I use that to my advantage. It takes more time than I would have liked to make it to the door but I don’t see her anywhere.
“Where the fuck is she?” I ask the bouncer that threw me out of the dressing room.
“Who are you looking for?” He answers without looking at me.
“You know good and goddamn well who I’m looking for. Where the fuck is Vixen?” I step up and bump his chest with mine. We’re equally matched in height and size so any physical altercation would be interesting.
“Sir, you need to step back if you expect me to answer your questions,” he says calmly. He obviously doesn’t understand the urgency of this situation, but I still give him the space because I want to know where she is.
“Where is Vixen? She was supposed to come see me in the private room, but she never showed up. You told me she would.”
“I’m sorry, sir, but Vixen has left. She asked me to tell you that she had to go.”
“She what?” I feel my blood pressure spike and my fists clench.
“I think it’s time for you to go, sir. I hope you find what you’re looking for,” he says as he opens the door and indicates that I need to leave. I don’t fight it, because what I want isn’t here anymore. I brush past him, making my way into the parking lot and toward my truck. I can’t believe that she did this. Monday morning is going to be very interesting, indeed.
I’ m a chicken shit. I just couldn’t do it. Facing James in that place is too much. I’ll have to deal with the consequences on Monday. Maybe I’ll just communicate with Joe only from now on. He’s a good guy. Hopefully that will keep a buffer between James and me until I get the project finished.
After Trevor walked me to my car, I’ve been sitting in the dark for a while trying to get my thoughts in order. My heart is beating so fast it feels like it’s going to come out of my chest. I try the deep breathing exercises that my therapist taught me after Erin’s suicide. It