Free Apprehension and Desire: A Tale of Pride and Prejudice by Ola Wegner Page A

Lizzy, Mama, in case she needs anything.” Jane left her embroidery and followed Elizabeth.
    “Go, Janie, go.” Mrs. Bennet nodded but then cried out after her retreating daughters, “Lizzy, but you must tell me everything tomorrow!”
    “Yes, Mama,” Elizabeth agreed tiredly.
    The sisters were silent on their way upstairs.
    “You must be tired indeed, Lizzy, ” Jane said when the door to their shared bedroom closed.
    Without a word or a warning, Elizabeth rushed into her sister’s arms. “I am so happy to see you, Jane.”
    They hugged, and Elizabeth sensed that her sister wanted to ask more but restrained herself, thinking her to be truly exhausted.
    “You are surprised, Jane,” Elizabeth said as they sat together on Elizabeth’s bed.
    “I confess that I am,” Jane said with a light frown on her smooth forehead. “You and Mr. Darcy? Lizzy, dear, as far as I recall, you wrote to me yourself that he was engaged to his cousin, Lady Catherine’s daughter.”
    Elizabeth shook her head. “No, he is not, Janie. I do not think that he would make me an offer were he engaged to another. In my opinion, his aunt desires this union, and Mr. Collins feels it is his duty to spread such rumour as a well established fact.”
    “But how did it happen?” Jane questioned, her eyes wide. “You never liked him. And Mr. Darcy, of all people? He seems so cold, so detached!”
    Elizabeth slipped from the bed and walked to the window, her arms folded in front of her. Should she tell her everything? What would Jane think of her, hearing that her sister was mercenary.
    “Do you remember how I wrote to you about the Parker sisters?” she asked after a long moment.
    Jane nodded.
    “I thought a lot about their lives now, after their father’s death, and what happened to them. God forbid, but if anything happened to Papa, all of us, you, me, Mary, Kitty and Lydia would share their fate.”
    “We cannot think about the worst possible situation, Elizabeth,” Jane said slowly. “Papa is in good health, and we have uncles...”
    “Jane,” Elizabeth interrupted her, “I saw Anne Parker in that inn, with the family she works for. You cannot imagine how horribly they treated her. Her sister’s fate is even worse; you know that she became a mistress to some wealthy man.”
    Jane did not say anything, only looked at her sister with great concern.
    “Once I thought that marriage without love was the worst thing that could happen in a woman’s life,” Elizabeth continued. “Today, however, my perspective is altered. Now, I truly understand Charlotte’s decision to marry Mr. Collins. Do not think for a moment that I regret rejecting him! But while I stayed with them for those weeks, I started to think differently. I decided that I would accept the next man who would be willing to make me an offer, even if I idd not love him. I know it was an act of cowardice on my part, but I was afraid of poverty and loneliness. I thought that in a marriage, I would have at least the children whom I could love.”
    “You did not think that Mr. Darcy would prove to be that man,” Jane whispered.
    “Exactly.” Elizabeth returned to the bed to sit next to her sister. “Oh, Jane, I was so astonished when he came to me!”
    “You said yes to him. It makes sense now.”
    Elizabeth lowered her head. “Jane, you are disappointed with me.”
    “Why, Lizzy?”
    “For accepting Mr. Darcy.”
    “No, Lizzy, never that. I am only worried for you; I want you to be happy.”
    Elizabeth bit her lower lip. “Oh, Jane, I have become a true mercenary.”
    Jane touched her arm. “You are too harsh on yourself.”
    “No, Jane, I know I am deceiving him. I agreed because of his wealth, and he thinks himself to be in love with me.”
    “I am sure he truly does love you, Lizzy, and very much, too, if he wants to marry you.”
    “He says that he does.”
    “It is good, Lizzy; he will treat you well, take care of you. Perhaps you will fall in love with him