Free Demise in Denim by Duffy Brown Page B

pulling out all the stops. Sister and I’ve been practicing like crazy to make sure we can hit the anguished high notes. We brought along our special lemon tea to keep our vocal cords warmed up. It’s our duty to give Mr. Adkins a proper send-off now. Botching this would be mighty bad for business, mighty bad indeed.”
    AnnieFritz cleared her throat, squared her shoulders, and let out with a sorrowful howl that nearly had me breaking into a fit of tears for no reason at all. BW stood beside her, licking her hand in sympathy, and Elsie passed around the box of tissues to the others in the store, who were now sobbing.
    â€œI think you nailed it.” My breath caught; a tear slid down my cheek and I had no idea why.
    â€œThey don’t pay us the big bucks for nothing.” Elsie went over to the round table in what was once the dining room. She picked up a black lacy hat with a wide brim and simple black rose. “And I do believe this will be a nice addition to my ensemble, don’t you agree, sister dear? We always need to be updating our attire and looking our best. Steffy Lou is even having us at the burial out at Bonaventure tomorrow morning to give her loving father-in-law a final tearful good-bye. Isn’t that the sweetest thing ever? We can’t be wearing the same thing to the wake and the burial, now can we, it just wouldn’t be proper at all.”
    AnnieFritz poured out the lemon tea, added drops of honey, and took the cups to the ladies shopping. Not doing so would be the epitome of bad manners and not like the sisters at all. I started in on my tea as Chantilly strutted her stuff into the shop.
    â€œSo, girlfriend, what do you think?” Chantilly smoothed her hand over her dress and jutted one blue sequin-clad hip. She batted her long fake eyelashes. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared openmouthed. Least it brought the crying to an end.
    I led Chantilly out onto the porch and whispered, “Are you trying to get into the Plantation Club or just
do
everyone in the club?”
    Chantilly harrumphed. “You said you wanted a diversion. I figure this here is a diversion. I said I was going slutty.”
    â€œAsking the time of day is a diversion, and I was thinkingtight jeans and sweater. Remember the closet Pillsbury mentioned? This is one way to get there quick.”
    Chantilly fluffed her sprayed and shellacked hair. “Here’s the thing: I figured if I just showed up in something marginally offensive the receptionist at the club would tell me to make an appointment and put us off for another day and then another and so on. If I show up in this little number that I wore at a Tina Turner costume party last year and if I threaten to hang around the club till I see Dixon, they’ll get him right quick. I’ll ask a bunch of stupid questions about the club, drive him crazy, and you can look around while I keep him busy and everyone else looking on.”
    â€œWhat if he calls the cops?”
    â€œFor what? Wearing sequins in the middle of the day? My guess is he’ll be polite and give me the 411. I’ll tell him I’ll think about it and leave.” Chantilly turned serious. “Walker is Pillsbury’s best friend, and Walker helped me when I had problems with Simon. I owe him. Let’s see what falls out of the plantation tree when we give it a little shake.”
    â€œThis is more hurricane than shake, but I get your point. Fifteen minutes should do it. We get in and we get out and if things blow up the way they sometimes do, you get out of there and take care of yourself.” I grabbed Old Yeller from under the counter, and Chantilly and I moseyed to the car.
    â€œYou’ll have to drive the Jeep.” Chantilly heaved a deep sigh and reluctantly passed over the keys as we crossed the street. “I’m having a devil of a time driving a stick shift in six-inch heels, and if I take these things off I’m