Free The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove by Christopher Moore Page A

then she heard something moving down in the creek bed—as if huge rocks were being kicked aside. Mutants, she thought. Where there were mushroom clouds, there were mutants, the curse of Kendra’s nuked-out world.
    Molly snatched the sword and ran into her trailer to hide.
    Theo
    The shock wave from the explosion had dissipated to the level of a sonic boom by the time it reached Theo’s little cabin two miles out of town. Still, he knew that something had happened. He sat up in bed to wait for the phone to ring. A minute and a half later, it did. The 911 dispatcher from San Junipero was on the line.
    â€œConstable Crowe? You’ve had some sort of explosion at the Texaco station on Cypress Street in Pine Cove.There are fires burning nearby. I’ve dispatched fire and ambulance, but you should get over there.”
    Theo struggled to sound alert. “Anyone hurt?”
    â€œWe don’t know yet. The call just came in. It sounds like a fuel tank went up.”
    â€œI’m on my way.”
    Theo swung his long legs out of bed and pulled on his jeans. He snatched his shirt, cell phone, and beeper from the nightstand and headed out to the Volvo. He could see an orange corona from the flames in the sky toward town and billowing black smoke streaking the moonlit sky.
    As soon as he started the car, the radio crackled with the voices of volunteer firemen who were racing to the site of the explosion in Pine Cove’s two fire engines.
    Theo keyed the mike. “Hey, guys, this is Theo Crowe. Anyone on scene yet?”
    â€œETA one minute, Theo” came back at him. “Ambulance is on scene.”
    An EMT from the ambulance came on the radio. “The Texaco is gone. So’s the burger stand. Doesn’t look like the fire is spreading. I don’t see anyone around, but if there was anybody in those two buildings, they’re toast.”
    â€œDelicate, Vance. Very professional,” Theo said into the mike. “I’ll be there in five.”
    The Volvo bucked over the rough dirt road. Theo’s head banged on the roof and he slowed enough to buckle his seat belt.
    Bert’s Burger Stand was gone. Gone. And the minimarket at the Texaco, gone too. Theo felt an empty rumbling in his stomach as he pictured his beloved minimarket nachos going black in the flames.
    Five minutes later he pulled in behind the ambulance and jumped out of the Volvo. The firefighters seemed to have the fire contained to the asphalt area of the Texaco and the burger stand. A little brush had burned on thehill behind the Texaco and had charred a few trees, but the firemen had drenched that area first to keep the fire from climbing into the residential area.
    Theo shielded his face with his hands. The heat coming off the burning Texaco was searing, even at a hundred yards. A figure in fire-fighting regalia approached him out of the smoke. A few feet away he pulled up the shield on his helmet and Theo recognized Robert Masterson, the volunteer fire chief. Robert and his wife Jenny owned Brine’s Bait, Tackle, and Fine Wines. He was smiling.
    â€œTheo, you’re gonna starve to death—both your food sources are gone.”
    Theo forced a smile. “Guess I’ll have to come to your place for brie and cabernet. Anyone hurt?” Theo was shaking. He hoped Robert couldn’t see it by the light of the fire and the rotating red lights of the emergency vehicles. He’d left his Sneaky Pete pipe on the nightstand.
    â€œWe can’t locate the driver of the truck. If he was in it, we lost him. Still too hot to get close to it. The explosion threw the cab two hundred feet that way.” Robert pointed to a burning lump of metal at the edge of the parking lot.
    â€œWhat about the underground tanks? Should we evacuate or something?”
    â€œNo, they’ll be fine. They’re designed with a vapor lock, no oxygen can get down there, so no fire. We’re going to have to let