Free 27 Wagons Full of Cotton and Other Plays by Tennessee Williams Page A

HARLIE: ( handing the coin to the Negro )Hyunh!
    N EGRO: ( breathlessly )Thankyseh!
    M R. C HARLIE: Huh! You’re too old a darkey to tote them big heavy cases.
    N EGRO: ( grinning sadly )Don’t say that, Mistuh Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: I reckon you’ll keep right at it until yuh drop some day.
    N EGRO: That’s right, Mistuh Charlie. ( Mr. Charlie fishes in his pocket for another quarter and tosses it to the Negro, who crouches and cackles as he receives it. )
    M R. C HARLIE: Hyunh!
    N EGRO: Thankyseh, thankyseh!
    M R. C HARLIE: Now set that fan in motion an’ bring me in some ice-water by an’ by!
    N EGRO: De fan don’ work, Mistuh Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: Huh! Deterioration! Everything’s going down-hill around here lately!
    N EGRO: Yes, suh, dat’s de troof, Mistuh Charlie, ev’ything’s goin’ down-hill.
    M R. C HARLIE: Who all’s registered here of my acquaintance? Any ole-timers in town?
    N EGRO: Naw, suh, Mistuh Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: “ Naw-suh-Mistuh-Charlie” ‘s all I get any more! You mean to say I won’t be able to scare up a poker-game?
    N EGRO: ( chuckling sadly )Mistuh Charlie, you’s de bes’ judge about dat!
    M R. C HARLIE: Well, it’s mighty slim pickin’s these days. Ev’ry time I come in a town there’s less of the old and more of the new and by God, nigguh, this new stand of cotton I see around the Delta’s not worth pickin’ off th’ ground! Go down there an’ tell that young fellow, Mr. Bob Harper, to drop up here for a drink!
    N EGRO: ( withdrawing )Yes, suh.
    M R. C HARLIE: It looks like otherwise I’d be playin’ solitaire!

    ( The Negro closes the door. Mr. Charlie crosses to the window and raises the blind. The evening is turning faintly blue. He sighs and opens his valise to remove a quart of whisky and some decks of cards which he slaps down on the table. He pauses and clasps his hand over his chest. )
    M R. C HARLIE: ( ominously to himself )Boom-boom-boom-boom-boom! Here comes th’ parade! ( After some moments there comes a rap at the door. )Come awn in! ( Harper, a salesman of thirty-five, enters. He has never known the “great days of the road” and there is no vestige of grandeur in his manner. He is lean and sallow and has a book of colored comics stuffed in his coat pocket. )
    H ARPER: How is the ole war-horse?
    M R. C HARLIE: ( heartily )Mighty fine an’ dandy! How’s the young squirrel?
    H ARPER: Okay.
    M R. C HARLIE: That’s the right answer! Step on in an’ pour you’self a drink! Cigar?
    H ARPER: ( accepting both )Thanks, Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: ( staring at his back with distaste )Why do you carry them comic sheets around with yuh?
    H ARPER: Gives me a couple of laughs ev’ry once and a while.
    M R. C HARLIE: Poverty of imagination! ( Harper laughs a little resentfully. )You can’t tell me there’s any real amusement in them things. ( He pulls it out of Harper’s coat pocket. ) “ Superman,” “The Adventures of Tom Tyler!” Huh! None of it’s half as fantastic as life itself! When you arrive at my age—which is seventy-eight—you have a perspective of time on earth that astounds you! Literally astounds you! Naw, you say it’s not true, all of that couldn’t have happened! And for what reason? Naw! You begin to wonder. . . . Well . . . You’re with Schultz and Werner?
    H ARPER: That’s right, Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: That concern’s comparatively a new one.

    H ARPER: I don’t know about that. They been in th’ bus’ness fo’ goin’ on twenty-five years now, Charlie.
    M R. C HARLIE: Infancy! Infancy! You heard this one, Bob? A child in its infancy don’t have half as much fun as adults—in their adultery! ( He roars with laughter. Harper grins. Mr. Charlie falls silent abruptly. He would have appreciated a more profound response. He remembers the time when a joke of his would precipitate a tornado. He fills up Harper’s glass with whisky. )
    H ARPER: Ain’t you drinkin’?
    M R. C HARLIE: Naw, suh. Quit!
    H ARPER: How