Free Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and Zombie Jim by Mark Twain, W. Bill Czolgosz Page A

some of them catched a bird, and his old granny said his father would die, and he did.
    And Jim said you mustn't count the things you are going to cook for dinner, because that would bring bad luck. The same if you shook the table-cloth after sundown. And he said if a man owned a beehive and that man died, the bees must be told about it before sun-up next morning, or else the bees would all weaken down and quit work and die. Jim said bees wouldn't sting idiots; but I didn't believe that, because I had tried them lots of times myself, and they wouldn't sting me.
    I had heard about some of these things before, but not all of them. Jim knowed all kinds of signs. He said he knowed most everything. Some things he knew when he was alive, and some things he din’ know until after he met the devil. I said it looked to me like all the signs was about bad luck, and so I asked him if there warn't any good-luck signs. He says:
    "Mighty few-an’ dey ain't no use to a body. What you want to know when good luck's a-comin’ for? Want to keep it off?” And he said: “Ef you's got hairy arms en a hairy breas', it's a sign dat you's agwyne to be rich. Well, dey's some use in a sign like dat, ‘kase it's so fur ahead. You see, maybe you's got to be po’ a long time fust, en so you might git discourage’ en kill yo'sef ‘f you didn’ know by de sign dat you gwyne to be rich bymeby."
    "Have you got hairy arms and a hairy breast, Jim?"
    "What's de use to ax dat question? Don't you see I has?"
    "Well, are you rich?"
    "No, but I ben rich wunst, and gwyne to be rich agin. Wunst I had foteen dollars, but I tuck to specalat'n', en got busted out."
    "What did you speculate in, Jim?"
    "Well, fust I tackled stock."
    "What kind of stock?"
    "Why, live stock-cattle, you know. I put ten dollars in a cow. But I ain’ gwyne to resk no mo’ money in stock. De cow up ‘n’ died on my han's."
    "So you lost the ten dollars."
    "No, I didn't lose it all. I on'y los’ ‘bout nine of it. I sole de hide en taller for a dollar en ten cents."
    "You had five dollars and ten cents left. Did you speculate any more?"
    "Yes. You know that one-laigged negro dat friends wit’ Misto Bradish? Well, he sot up a bank, en say anybody dat put in a dollar would git fo’ dollars mo’ at de en’ er de year. Well, all de negros went in, but dey didn't have much. I wuz de on'y one dat had much. So I stuck out for mo’ dan fo’ dollars, en I said ‘f I didn’ git it I'd start a bank mysef. Well, o’ course dat negro want’ to keep me out er de business, bekase he says dey warn't business ‘nough for two banks, so he say I could put in my five dollars en he pay me thirty-five at de en’ er de year.
    "So I done it. Den I reck'n'd I'd inves’ de thirty-five dollars right off en keep things a-movin'. Dey wuz a characta name’ Bob, dat had ketched a wood-flat, en his partner didn’ know it; en I bought it off'n him en told him to take de thirty-five dollars when de en’ er de year come; but somebody stole de wood-flat dat night, en nex day de one-laigged negro say de bank's busted. So dey didn’ none uv us git no money."
    "What did you do with the ten cents, Jim?"
    "Well, I ‘uz gwyne to spen’ it, but I had a dream, en de dream tole me to give it to a negro name’ Balum-Balum's Ass dey call him for short; he's one er dem chuckleheads, you know. But he's lucky, dey say, en I see I warn't lucky. De dream say let Balum inves’ de ten cents en he'd make a raise for me. Well, Balum he tuck de money, en when he wuz in church he hear de preacher say dat whoever give to de po’ len’ to de Lord, en boun’ to git his money back a hund'd times. So Balum he tuck en give de ten cents to de po', en laid low to see what wuz gwyne to come of it."
    "Well, what did come of it, Jim?"
    "Nuffn never come of it. I couldn’ manage to k'leck dat money no way; en Balum he couldn'. I ain’ gwyne to len’ no mo’ money ‘dout I see de security. Boun’ to git yo’ money back a