Free The Big "O": A Romantic Comedy by H. Raven Rose Page A

herself later. She made a cup of green tea and decided to start her online marketing campaign right then.
    'Up and at 'em' would become her new motto.
    Over the next hour, Emily set up or updated social networking sites for their business.
    Emily set up a Twitter, which she hadn't used before and updated their business FaceBook. She decided to upload better photos and took what he had that was most recent and decent and made certain that all of their sites had near identical branding.
    She used a site to set up automatic posts for their primary social media sites and created files of aggregate content. She would check in often, updating through her smart phone, but wanted to be certain that her accounts had frequent new content.
    She went into their eBook online dashboard. They'd kept the digital rights to their book, and had put their eBook "Ka-Ching!" on sale.
    She looked at her watch and realized that she had fifteen minutes to get to little Max's school. She jumped up, grabbed her purse and keys, and ran to the car.

    ~
    Juliette stood in front of a freshman introduction to psychology class. The students were quiet while they focused entirely on their exam. In her tortoiseshell glasses and lightweight pantsuit, with long brunette hair, she was an utterly sexy nerd. Her mobile phone, from within her pocket, vibrated. Startled, she jumped and pulled out her cellular phone.
    The text read: Babe, come home early? Surprise for you.
    Juliette grinned. She knew it.
    Victor had been doing research: on how to begin to please her, how to deepen their physical and emotional love connection, and maybe even how to give her some full-bodied pleasure. Obviously, tonight he was going to practice. Thank goodness.
    Vic, wearing a pair of dark shades, struggled to remain incognito, as he slowly perused the shelves of an ultra-modern sex shop. Without touching anything, he checked out outrageous new sex toys for women. He paused in front of a display of pink, girly vibrators.
    After much indecision, between several different high-tech vibrating gadgets, Victor finally put a vibrator into the metal shopping basket on his arm. Already inside the shopping basket was a how-to please your woman video, a flavored lubricant, a Kama Sutra Love Kit (a beautifully decorated cardboard tube with a pamphlet of suggestions, including sexual positions, a little feather tickler, and edible honey-almond massage oil), massage oil, and an edible candy male G-string thong.
    Victor looked more confident, almost happy, now that he had some sex pleasure toys and research materials. Maybe, just maybe, he thought, he could figure out how to please Juliette. His confidence lasted until he left the vibrator aisle, turned the corner, and saw something towering over him.
    He looked up to see a gorgeous Amazon-like woman, a ginormous larger-than-life cardboard cut-out of Charlene Hanson, author of the “Multi-Orgasmic Married Woman, Oh Wow” on display in front of a beautifully draped table which was color-branded to match her book's cover design. Vic’s entire demeanor changed and he appeared to shrink.
    For a moment he considered picking up one of Charlene Hanson’s books. Was it possible that this chick's tome could help his marriage? He deliberated. Maybe the book wasn't self-help bullshit and a complete utter waste of time. He looked at all of the sex toys and stuff that he had in his shopping basket and then looked back at the book.
    The toys looked fun; he was getting a little excited just thinking about Juliette eating the G-string thong off of his body. The book looked boring. Maybe the Kama-fucking-Sutra was alright, he decided, that shit had fucking awesome pictures.
    Nah, he didn't need that stupid book. He turned his back on the book display and, feeling very proud of his commitment to meet Juliette's sexual needs, and improve his marriage, he went to the register to pay for the items in his shopping basket.

    ~
    Max faced his son. Baby Max, a mostly