Free Always and Forever by Soraya Lane Page B

to bubble up within her now that she’d acknowledged how good she felt. She forced them away, didn’t want to think about cancer or babies or . . . She swallowed and took a slow, deep breath.
    “If we’re going on a road trip then we need a super-cool car,” Matt winked.
    Lisa leaned back into their outdoor sofa, smiling as she cradled her champagne, no longer in danger of snapping the glass into shards. She’d been dreading the day for so long, but now it was here . . . she had a lot to be thankful for and she knew it. The cancer, the baby . . . They were all stumbling blocks, barriers in the way of what was supposed to be an amazing life. But she had Matt and her family, and she needed to start being grateful instead of resentful, before she ended up losing her husband and becoming all bitter and twisted. Her cancer hadn’t just ended her dreams—it had ended Matt’s too, and it was hard to deal with the fact that she was the obstacle standing between Matt and his ability to become a dad.
    “Can we end the trip in Mexico?” she asked, dreaming of white sand and blue water.
    “Mexico?” Matt asked, eyebrow arched. “You’re serious?”
    “Yeah,” she said. “I am.”
    Matt laughed. “Hell yes. Mexico here we come!”
    Lisa smiled. Driving around, heading for Mexico—it all sounded perfect. Maybe a vacation a long way from home was exactly what they both needed. A change of scenery to remind her of all the good things that were still in the world.
    They sat for a while, sipping, silent. The light had almost completely disappeared, and as darkness engulfed them, the pretty little lights that Lisa had strung up across the pergola at Thanksgiving the year before, all through the wisteria, twinkled back at her.
    “Matt, I don’t ever want to sell the house,” she said, not taking her eyes off their beautifully renovated bungalow. They’d bought it just after they’d been married. It had been a work in progress for years, but when they’d found out she was pregnant, Matt had spent every spare hour finishing the place. It had been transformed from a house into a home, the whitewashed walls and pretty country-style kitchen everything she’d ever dreamed of, with doors opening out to a big sun-filled patio. Their floors were stained the perfect shade of dark chocolate, gnarled old wood beneath, but made beautiful by sanding, staining and sealing. And she’d chosen every piece of furniture with their renovated home in mind, the home that was supposed to be for a family. “Even after everything, I never want to sell this place.”
    “I don’t want to sell it either, Lisa. It’s our home, no matter what. Why have you been worrying about that? There’s no need.”
    She was blinking away tears again when Matt’s smile stopped her from choking up, told her that she needed to stay strong. Today was not the day for tears.
    “It’s just that we bought this home and fixed it up so we could have a family, and now we’re not having kids . . .”
    “Sweetheart, if we want to have kids, we can have kids. You know I’m up for adoption or whatever it takes!”
    She shook her head. “Don’t, Matt. Not now.”
    He shrugged. “I’m not selling this place after all the work I put into it. So don’t even worry about it—it’s still our home.”
    She nodded, wished she could be as optimistic as he was.
    “I love you, Lisa,” he said, taking her by surprise with his words.
    Lisa looked into his eyes. “I love you, too.” She smiled, trying not to be sad, wishing she felt differently. “ Promise I do .”
    Matt put down his beer and pulled her into his arms, onto his lap. “Baby, I know it. I always have.”
    It was Matt with tears in his eyes now. Matt who never cried no matter what, who’d stayed so strong. The only other time she’d seen his eyes fill with tears was the day they’d found out they were expecting a son; but on the day he’d been taken from them her husband had remained