Free Sons by Michael Halfhill Page B

and clench his fists. This is not going well . He cocked his head toward Colin.
    “Michael, I’m not sure Colin wants to go to a private school. What about it, son? How do you feel about it?”
    Colin thought, He’s overdoing the son routine. How can he feel like my father overnight? I sure don’t feel like his son!
    “I’m not sure,” Colin replied flatly, hoping Jan hadn’t noticed his anger. “School’s school, I guess. One’s like another, but I sure don’t want anybody hitting me!”
    Michael said, “Well, you better think fast because I believe school begins in a few days, so you must decide soon.”
    Colin stared into the new fire Amal had lit in the fireplace and tried to focus on what was happening. School. Another rope around my neck!
    Jan nodded and said, “Colin, do you mind if I check into All Souls and see if they have an opening there? They’re run by the Episcopal Church—no nuns, thank God!”
    Colin shrugged.
    “If I don’t like it I can switch to public school?”
    “All right, so long as you give All Souls a chance. Deal?”
    “Deal,” Colin agreed.
    “I’ll call the school tomorrow, and we have to see about some clothes for you. Did your Aunt Elaine pack anything for you?” Jan said.
    Colin walked over to the window. Jan followed and stood beside him, looking out of the corner of his eye while pretending to watch a Coast Guard officer board a newly arrived ship anchored near the pier.
    Great! Jan thought. Just what Michael needs, a security check on one of his deliveries, and on New Year’s Day, no less.
    “Colin, I guess you’re feeling pretty overwhelmed. I can’t blame you. I would too. Trust me, things will settle down.”
    “Doesn’t my Aunt Elaine love me anymore?” Colin blurted, his voice hanging between anger and the fear of knowing an awful truth.
    The question dragged Jan back to his past, so similar in so many ways. His father dead, ordered from the only home he ever knew. Tim, the man he loved, kept him like a sex toy, someone easily turned in for a brighter model at any moment. Even his brief stint as a husband ended after Angela drove him from their marriage bed. His heart ached for Colin.
    He chose his words carefully. “I don’t know. What I mean is, I don’t know her very well. She never seemed like a person who wanted kids around, so that probably made her look like she didn’t love you. I’m sure she did.”
    Jan wasn’t sure of anything of the kind, but he wasn’t about to hurt his son anymore over the situation.
    She doesn’t give a shit about me . Colin thought. All she wanted was to get rid of me. That’s why she dumped me here with these queers.
    Colin shot Jan a cynical look. “Thanks, nice try.” He looked down and shuffled his feet. “Umm, can I go to my room for a while?”
    “Sure. Amal will prepare lunch later. I’ll call you down when it’s ready.”
    As Colin turned back from the window and walked away, Jan noticed Michael was gone.

Thirteen

     
    J AN dropped Colin off at the entrance of All Souls School, having secured a place for him in the freshman midterm curriculum the day before. Driving back to the Federal Court House offices, Jan reflected that from the moment they met, Colin’s behavior swung wildly between barely suppressed rage and a slow, almost unconscious attitude of acceptance. At times, he even seemed happy.
    He can’t go through this much longer or he’ll have a meltdown , Jan thought . I wonder what he’s really thinking.
     
     
    B ROTHER J ULIAN met Colin inside the entrance of All Souls School and guided him out through a colonnade of covered arches that embraced the four sides of a grassy quad. The open cloister served a variety of functions. In good weather, the brothers took breakfast and evening meals under frescos of Olympian deities.
    “Italian immigrants painted these ceilings in the mid-nineteenth century,” Brother Julian explained. “During the school year, the brothers and students meet