Free Heartbreak Cake by Cindy Arora Page A

being afraid. I can often see it in other people too.”
Teresa lowers her head, embarrassed.
“Am I really ready to be someone’s wife? That just seems so grown-up and official. What if I change my mind? What if I can’t do this day-in-day-out? What if Oscar changes, or I do, and then we grow apart?”
“That’s a lot of what-if questions, and unfortunately, I don’t know if anyone can answer them, ever. You just take a chance and hope for the best.”
Teresa nibbles on her thumbnail nervously. “What if we don’t make it?”
“You got a fifty-fifty chance just like everyone else. I’ll tell you this; I meet couples every single day, and you two genuinely seem to like one another. It’s infectious. I always feel a little better after I see you both.”
“Thanks.” Teresa smiles fondly at the idea. “I told Oscar I was afraid, and it hurt his feelings. He said he never hesitates when it comes to me. So, it made me wonder if maybe that meant…I didn’t really want to marry him.”
“Everyone responds to things differently. There’s no doubt that you love Oscar. Getting scared is part of the process. Just call him up and say that, and everything will be fine. You guys are going to be great.”
Teresa looks thoughtfully at her engagement ring, twisting it around her finger over and over again while I sit and drink my wine quietly, giving her space to think.
Josh and I used to talk about our wedding—it would be a beach wedding, with fire pits and one long farmhouse table placed in the middle of the sand where all of our friends and family would sit together. Simon would cook dinner and Pedro would design the cake, of course.
It was the only time in my adult life that I had allowed myself to daydream about a wedding day. And it hurt to even think that I was so…optimistic about another person. Who am I to give advice to Teresa? I have seen hundreds of couples get married and had heard about so many of their divorces. But why would I tell Teresa that?
“You ever been in love?” Teresa says, eyeing me curiously.
“Yes.”
“What happened?”
“It was wonderful. Then it fell apart,” I say nonchalantly, even though I don’t feel that way. “Sometimes things just fall apart and you can’t piece them together again.”
“Did you fight for him?” she asks. “I did. Or at least I think I did.”
“Maybe you didn’t try hard enough.”
I think about Josh’s face this afternoon and the way he looked like he wanted to say something to me. It’s the same look he has given me the last year, his face full of emotion, but the words and the action never materialize.
Yes, I fought for him and I waited for him, but maybe I made it too easy for him since I was always there giving him everything he wanted. Me, her, and his family. Maybe if I had actually walked away, he would’ve had the chance to miss me, long for me, and remember me. Instead, I got a secret life, a lot of Chinese takeout, and a lot of nights crying myself to sleep.
No. I would say Josh never fought for me .
“I tried as hard as I could. And now it’s up to him.” I shrug, feeling resentment and disappointment surge through me.
Teresa pats my hand sweetly and shoves the brownie pan my way. “You’re gonna be alright,” she says.
“I know. Just not tonight.” I take a gulp from my wine glass.
    ***
     
Forever a good Girl Scout, little Miss Teresa, I think, as I tuck a pillow behind her head and take the cell phone that she’s holding like a stuffed animal. Snuggled up against my chenille blanket, Teresa passed out on my couch after she declared herself too drunk to drive.
She spent the last hour of the evening calling herself “Mrs. Oscar Padilla” in a voice louder than my neighbors probably appreciated. But I felt accomplished. At least I was able to save a relationship. And three hundred mini caramel-apple pies.
I hear my phone vibrate against my wooden kitchen table, and I know it’s just another message from Rebecca who has spent