Free Pop Tarts: Omnibus Edition by Brian Lovestar Page A

in the band - which was
probably just as well - as the likeness spell had now become
permanent and Hawky Andrews was stuck in the guise and really
didn’t fancy going back to being a poodle hairdresser in
sun-drenched Sheffield.
    The only
problem now was how they were going to get Felix back from the
80s!
    Rhino assured
the girls he was going to work on a spell to ensure this would
happen, but he was secretly just a little bit concerned.
    His magic
powers had already been depleted after all the trickery he had been
up to in recent weeks and now he was sure those remaining had in
fact been stolen.
    His fairy wand
wasn’t working, no matter how many times he said waved it saying
“Abracadabra.”
    He hoped to
find a way around it, but nothing the girls needed to concern
themselves with right now.
    Rita the rat
had scuttled off into the gutter where she belonged and Tequila Sun
were back together again.
    They decided to
have a glass of champagne to celebrate - not pink of course – when
Rhino suddenly noticed a record in Holly’s retro Blaupunkt
radiogram drinks cabinet.
    “Holly, where
did you get this?” he asked in excitement. “Is this the record from
Felix’s apartment on the day of the explosion?”
    “I guess so,”
Holly replied, a little confused, but then again it didn’t take
much.
    “Oh my God!” he
exclaimed in delight. “This is it! This is the way to get Felix
back!”
    Both Holly and
Cherry were puzzled.
    “It’s the
record I used in the spell to send him back to 1987!” he
exclaimed.
    Evidently this
was the key to extracting Felix from the delicious decade he had
been sent back to.
    All Rhino
needed now was to somehow find out what had happened to his
magic.
    “Make sure you
take good care of this. I’ll need it to reverse the spell to get
Felix back,” he said, before heading off to locate the Queen of the
Witch Coven to see if she could help.
    Cherry went
home to get some rest. She’d endured quite a tough time. It wasn’t
every weekend you were held captive in a sex dungeon!
    Just every
other, then.
    Holly peered
from behind the curtain and watched as her band mates hugged on the
pavement outside, before each going their separate ways.
    She got the
precious record and abruptly snapped it in half, before dropping it
on the floor and stamping on it a few times in her stiletto
heels.
    Then she
proceed to the bedroom to get the plaster cast dildo containing
Felix’s ashes, just in case they needed that too.
    She drove for
what seemed like miles - until she came to a beachy cliff top - got
out of the car and walked right up to the edge.
    She watched as
the waves crashed violently into the rocks below her, then kissed
the dildo goodbye and threw it off the cliff top edge, as far as
her strength and energy could muster.

Chapter 24.
(Full Circle)

    Back in the
80s, a few weeks had passed and Felix Sr. was now living on his own
in a very basic bed and breakfast in West Wittering, Chichester;
about one hour south of London.
    He’d left later
that same morning, telling Felix Jr. some random excuse or
other.
    Felix Jr. had
been a little perplexed by his supposed father’s sudden departure,
but had bigger fish to fry, such as making up with his fiancé, the
illustrious, very jealous and ultra-possessive Holly Wood.
    Felix Sr. had
devised that if he kept away, time would play out as required, his
timeline would go untouched and he’d somehow make his way back to
present time.
    He hoped within
at least 3 years so he didn’t have to endure the terrible 1990s
again.
    It was surely
the decade that music taste and style truly forgot.
    There was
virtually no Kylie or A-ha.
    And he wasn’t
sure he could bear the delights of happy hardcore, Britpoo or The
Vice Girls a second time around.
    Even the
alternative of ceasing to exist seemed more enticing a
proposition.
    And that was
basically his biggest fear!
    He’d read up on
time travel and become convinced now more than ever that if he
changed the