Free Pending by Clint Gleason

ENTRY 2
     
    I’m Trent. Not sure if I mentioned
that yet. Well, that’s kind of silly considering I know who I am because I’m me.
I guess it’s for anyone else who has to read it in case I die or something, or if
I have amnesia some day and need to remember my own name. It isn’t likely, but I’m
not going to “waste the eraser” as my fellow journalists have said. You never know
what’s going to be good or not. I read that in a magazine, but I can’t remember
which one. Bet it was about up top. Ha-ha.
    I was born in this facility.
Facility Three, that’s what they call it. Not sure what goes on at the other two,
but this is the one where the energy is created. We all help. That energy is used
for the rest of the country, and I’ve been told everyone in America has the same
work commitment that I do. Mine is thirty years, so nineteen left. Feels like forever.
It is forever. It won’t get here fast enough. I can’t wait to see what’s up there
and join society. It’s what I think about the most.
    The work is exhausting physically.
I think I just need to eat more. They give us vitamins to help. Mentally, I’m OK,
but I never tell them that. I don’t think the doctors can tell. I’ll keep it a secret.
I’m hooked up to those couplings most of the day, and I feel the extraction circuits
doing what they do. I’m hungry all the time, even though there are regular breaks.
I still wish they’d let me take more breaks though. It takes a lot out of me. I
need to eat to sustain that energy, but I’m afraid to complain because none of the
other workers seem to be as affected as I am. I’ve also tried to ask them about
it before, but when I have, I’m usually stopped. No talking during work time. If
we’re disciplined during work we could have time added to our work commitment.
    It wouldn’t be so bad if they
let us socialize more. I wish I had friends, like the ones up top that I read about.
Maybe I’ll bring it up again when the timing’s right, when I feel as though they’re
in a good mood. It feels important. The handbook says to bring up anything that’s
life threatening. Being alone feels that way to me.
    ***
    I was ranked thirty-two today!
They’re always encouraging me to do better though, even though I tell them I do
my best. There is a list posted daily, and the ones in the top ten are announced
over the loudspeaker. I’ve only been on it twice, but it hasn’t been for a few months.
They’re constantly reminding everyone of how well the ones on the top of the list
are doing.
    That doesn’t get annoying!
    I could put out more energy,
a lot more, but we’re only allowed to output as much as everyone else. There’s a
gauge at every station, and I was told that any more than the maximum level can
short-circuit the workstation. Less workstations means less energy outputted, so
damaged equipment is attributed to the worker, and the resulting disciplinary action
is more time added to your work commitment. It’s crap. I wish I could produce as
much as I was fully capable of and shorten my work commitment. If I could do that,
I’d be up top in a few years.
    They say that to get on the
list would require more concentration. It isn’t about the sheer amount of energy
produced but the volume that the facility requires for the day. They say that when
I think of other things, it takes away from the energy I produce. Well, how long
can you concentrate on the same boring thing, day after day?
    They don’t know this, but
I’m always thinking about other things, mostly about up top. In fact, I barely focus
on energy production. I could do my job in my sleep.

ENTRY 3
     
    I asked about spending time
with the other kids, and they said they’d look into it. That’ll have to be good
enough for now. At least they’re going to try. We’re either working or learning,
so just being around them in the classroom isn’t enough. Kids need to spend time
with each other alone so they can do normal kid stuff. I