Free Tommy's Ark: Soldiers and Their Animals in the Great War. Richard Van Emden by Richard van Emden Page B

’em within miles of me. But they smashed up that wood, and that hole you gave me was worse than nottin’.’
    ‘Well, consider yourself under arrest for desertion, and come along.’
    ‘Here,’ he said indignantly, ‘what’s the bloody joke, anyway?’
    He stood up. I caught him by the collar of his greatcoat with both hands, and backed him against the tree.
    ‘This is the bloody joke,’ I said, emphasising every few words by banging the back of his head against the tree trunk. ‘You are now a soldier on active service. You were given a responsible job on which the safety of the regiment depended. You left that job without being properly relieved, and without reason. Do you know I could have you shot?’
    ‘Ah, for God’s sake, Corporal, let’s go, and chuck it. Without reason indeed! What bloody man would stay there?’
    ‘Anyway, you’re for a court martial.’ I released him. He simply did not believe me.
    ‘I came out here to fight,’ he said, ‘and not to stand for a bloody cockshy.’ And attending to immediate affairs, he picked up his cap, slung his rifle, and carefully collecting his roast chicken, stumped after me.
    I was really perturbed, and I lied boldly to cover him when we got back.
     
    It was an education for soldiers from urban backgrounds to see how those who were raised in the countryside turned their hand to foraging and making do with whatever came to hand. Hunger opened up a completely new range of delicacies for many men who were aghast at what could pass as food.
    L/Cpl Alfred Vivian, 4th Middlesex Regt
    One of our number, foraging about, now captured a hedgehog, which he brought to the circle with him. Here, with a very businesslike air, he produced his knife and killed it. I was rather surprised at this brutal and wanton action, and I asked him why he had done it.
    ‘Ter eat o’ course,’ he replied, smacking his lips and evincing signs of anticipation of gastronomic pleasure.
    The body of the little beast was enclosed in a ball of clay. A fire was kindled and the ball placed in it and covered over. The remainder sat around, watching these proceedings with great interest, not unmixed with repulsion at the thought of anybody eating such a thing.
    Presently, the ball having cracked open through the effects of the heat, our gourmet removed it, and, breaking it in half, exposed to our view the steaming carcass of the hedgehog, devoid of all its bristles, which had been left imprisoned in the clay. The result was a tasty looking and pleasant smelling morsel.
    He handed this product of his culinary prowess around, permitting each of us to take one small pinch by way of a taster, and, as he put it, to teach us to refrain from sneering at the knowledge possessed by our betters.
    It proved extremely succulent and delicious, and we sat around him, enviously watching him with watering mouths, like a crowd of expectant hounds, as he consumed the remainder with aggravating noises of profound enjoyment and satisfaction.
     
    With the onset of winter, the fighting died down. The supply of food was a little more regular than it had once been, but anything that could be bought or stolen locally to supplement the diet was always welcome. Pilfering was not reserved for other ranks, either; officers were also not averse to helping themselves. One, a Lieutenant Gallaher, was chased by pitchfork-wielding French peasants after being discovered illegally fishing. Gallaher and his batman had caught two salmon, both of which had been stuffed down their breeches. The fish continued to struggle as both men ran across fields to make good their escape.
    Anonymous, 4th (Royal Irish) Dragoon Guards
    ‘Nasty’ Carter thought it would be a good idea if the troop had some fish for dinner, so he and some of the lads set some dead lines in the local river. As the water was a bit low, they shut off the sluices and then got down to some serious fishing. About one o’clock in the morning the guards woke me up and