Free Vita Sexualis by Ōgai Mori

talking with Hanyu, I was careless and slovenly, never restrained, but if I happened to use even a little vulgarity or obscenity in speaking with Eiichi, he would immediately flare up. He pictured to himself conditions in which one did not enjoy sensual pleasures until, graduating with a degree and loved by his teacher's daughter or some such type, he makes her his wife. Then, should he become a prominent figure whose name is celebrated all over the land, he could, like the Chinese poet Toba, certainly be loved by a geisha. At that time such a man could print a poem on a silk handkerchief and give it to her.
    When I went to Eiichi's house. I occasionally found he was out with his father. Often at those times I happened to meet Hanno, whose long hair was parted in two down to the nape of his neck. As I would be calling Eiichi from outside the house and even before I entered, Hanno would open a sliding door from inside, come out, and then go back in. After that Eiichi's mother would appear at the door and say some nice things to me.
    She was Eiichi's stepmother. One day when I was reading Seisetsuroshisho with him, we were reciting a poem about Mama-no-Tekona, who, because she was wooed by many young men, committed suicide by drowning. The poem having suddenly reminded me of Eiichi's stepmother, I asked, "They say your mother isn't your real one. Does she bully you?"
    "No, she doesn't," said Eiichi, but it seemed to me it was unpleasant for him to talk about her.
    Once at about two in the afternoon on a fine August day, I went over to Eiichi's house. Attached to every tenement building is a small garden surrounded by a bamboo fence. Placed at random in the Bito family garden were four or five plants which I presumed had been purchased at some festival. The sun was blazing down on the sandy soil. I could hear the locusts singing so noisily the sound seemed to fill the area of thickly luxurious plants in the garden of our lord's mansion. It was extremely quiet in the Bito house, its paper sliding doors closed. Opening the small wicket of twigs along the bamboo fence, I called out as usual, "Eiichi!"
    There was no reply.
    "Isn't Eiichi at home?"
    The sliding doors opened. Hanno came out, that same long hair of his parted in two down to the nape of his neck. A man with a white complexion, a tall man with drooping shapely shoulders, he used the pure Tokyo dialect.
    "Eiichi isn't at home. Please come over to my place for a while."
    With these words he returned inside to his apartment next door. All over the back of his dappled cotton kimono were loud flashy patterns. Eiichi's mother slowly came out to the threshold. Fingering with both her hands the sidelocks of her hair bound into a chignon by a light blue band of silk crepe, she began talking to me. They said she had only just come up to Tokyo, but to my surprise she too was using the pure Tokyo dialect.
    "Good heavens! Is it Mr. Kanai? Oh do please come in."
    "All right. But as long as Eiichi isn't home ..."
    "When he found out his father was going fishing, he decided to tag along. Even though he isn't at home, you needn't worry. There, now you sit right down."
    "All right."
    Reluctantly I sat down on the veranda. Mrs. Bito again came out slowly, almost indolently, and raising one knee sat down beside me, her body almost nestling against mine. I could smell her sweat, her face powder, the oil she used on her hair. I moved a little to the side. She smiled, though I didn't know why.
    "I've no idea why you're so kind as to play so often with a boy like Eiichi. I've never seen such an unsociable child."
    She had ridiculously large eyes and a ridiculously large nose and mouth. I even felt her mouth was square-shaped.
    "I like Eiichi very much."
    "You don't like me?"
    She almost seemed to press her cheek against mine as she peered at me from the side. Her breath fell against my face. I felt that breath was strangely hot. And at the same time it suddenly occurred to me that Eiichi's