Sheâd been so angry at her mother and Mallory, so ready to assert her independence.
In her mind, she hadnât ever taken it further than the moment when her client would gaze, admiringly open-mouthed, at her sexy animal-tamer costume.
But it wasnât fun. Instead, the experience had beenâ¦
It had been disgusting. And strangely pathetic. For both of them.
Dorian Swigert, that was his name, sheâd never forget it. The name fit him. Odd and unattractive, full of ugly, bony angles.
For months afterward, the very idea of sex had made her gag. She was sure sheâd never be able to see a naked man without remembering Dorian.
Without remembering a pale, freckled back with seeping red lines running across it. And the sweaty face of a stranger, a twisted stranger who wanted her to whip wounds into his skin, rub them hard, and then use her bloody hand to milk him to a noisy, disturbingly bestial climax.
When he left, sheâd been sick in the hotel bathroomâs plastic trash can. She had been as numb as achina doll for weeks, except when she tossed in her sleep and dreamed about blood and woke up roiling with nausea.
There had even come a time when she thought she couldnât go on.
But Freddy, like the answer to a prayer she hadnât believed she had the right to pray, had miraculously changed all that. With his warm arms and gentle lips, he had somehow managed to erase those pictures and make new, beautiful ones to take their place.
He had even quieted her dreams.
And that was why, she thought as she opened her arms and held him to her heart, she mustnât ever let him down again.
And why it was going to be so terribly hard to tell him the truth.
CHAPTER SIX
A LL S ATURDAY MORNING , Mallory was a nervous wreck. She was counting the minutes until Mindy arrived, partly because she always loved her rare weekends with her little sister, and partly because this visit was so important. Sheâd have two short days to persuade Mindy that honesty, however painful, really was the best policy.
Plus, Mallory found herself eyeing the telephone the way she might watch a big, poisonous spider that was crouching on her counter. By now the blackmailer must know how disobedient Mallory had been. Not only had she tried to follow him, but she had also dared to dictate how often and how much he could require her to pay.
So how long could it be before the phone rang? And what form would his fury take this time?
Luckily, the bookstore was always hectic on Saturdays, which helped the hours pass more quickly.
It was Story Time over in Calliope Corner, the childrenâs area. On her last visit home, Mindy had painted a darling mural of an ornate circus calliope on thewalls, and Mallory had loaded the space with colorful pillows and stuffed tigers, lions, gorillas and monkeys.
The kids loved it. As an added attraction, Binky Potter, one of the seniors from the local high-school drama club, came in for two hours every Saturday to read aloud to the children.
That had been one of Malloryâs best hires. Binky, who was gorgeous, always dressed up like a sparkling blue-sequined circus ballerina, and Mallory had noticed a trend of older brothers suddenly volunteering to bring their siblings in for story time.
Binky was also a darn good actor, terrific with accents and silly voices. Mallory knew sheâd sell at least a dozen copies of whatever book Binky chose each week.
The rest of the store was hopping, too. If Mallory hadnât been so distracted, she would have been thrilled. If business kept up like this, sheâd be able to pay Roddy back sooner than sheâd thought.
The mayor of Heyday, Joe Dozier, didnât often grace her with his business, but today she couldnât seem to get rid of him. Though Joe had plenty of money to spend, he wasnât her favorite person. He treated his wife badly, openly mocking her squeaky voice and mousy manner.
Plus, he had a mean look in his little