Free Burn This! (A 300 Moons Book)(Bad Boy Alphas) by Tasha Black Page A

be alone that much, you know?”
    There were nods around the circle.
    “But of course I said yes. The first Friday I had a couple of drinks in the morning, but by the time the kids got home I was able to hold it together.
    “The next Friday, I drank a little more.”
    He stopped speaking and bit his lip.
    “When the school called to say that Marlee was sick, I was panicked. I got in the car, I… I knew it was only a couple of blocks to the school.
    “I was almost there, I could see the building, and suddenly there was a crash, I was slammed into my seat belt. The air bag went off.
    “I had hit another car.
    “The driver was okay, thank God. But both the cars were totaled.
    “I could have killed someone.
    “If I hadn’t had that accident, I could have killed someone on the way home with Marlee in the car.
    “I could have killed Marlee.
    “Of course the police were called. And I was arrested, right in front of her school. They put me in handcuffs. I agreed to rehab as part of my sentence. But I would be here anyway. I don’t want to be owned by the drinking anymore.
    “Now my wife and daughter have to continue their public lives and endure this shame of mine. While I sit here, protected, looking at the pretty landscaping and eating hors d’oeuvres.
    “I’ve never wanted a drink more in my life,” he finished.
    As Johnny reeled, Neve asked someone else to share.
    “I know this may sound silly,” Barb said softly, “but my gardener, Hector, has been with me forever. He tended the garden before we bought the estate. His pride and joy is the rose garden. He tends those plants like they were his children, trimming, fertilizing, using that misting machine.
    “At first he didn’t seem to like me too much, I guess he thought I was one more mean rich lady. We had renovated the whole place and even tried to get him to redo the landscape, but he told us he would rather leave than do that.
    “That made me think, and I followed him in his work for a day, I saw how much he loved those gardens and how much thought had gone into their design. I asked him to stay and keep them just as they were.
    “My life is… kind of boring,” she admitted. Mimi and Bonnie nodded their heads up and down in agreement.
    “Hank is always at work. The kids are in school. It’s no excuse for drinking too much, but… Anyway, to pass the time, I would visit the gardens a lot. Over time I gained Hector’s trust, I would like to say even his friendship.
    “One morning I got a call from Hank that he wouldn’t be home for the rest of the week - he had an unexpected work trip. I was upset and I drank too much, as always. But instead of stopping when it was too much I just kept going. I even helped myself to a few of the pain pills I had left over from my root canal last year.
    “And then I decided to visit the rose garden.
    “The last thing I remember is vomiting all over the roses.
    “When I woke up I was here.
    “I wonder if Hector will ever look at me again,” she sniffled and Mimi wrapped an arm around her.
    Neve looked to Clarence.
    “The worst part for me is letting myself down,” Clarence said in a clear voice.
    Johnny noticed again how comfortable the man seemed.
    “I felt like when I left the last time I was in a really good place. I felt like I was finally done with that stuff.”
    A repeater, that explained why he felt so at home here. It wasn’t his first rodeo.
    “But…” the man continued.
    “But it’s like there’s a demon inside me.
    “And no matter how good my life is, he only wants to watch it burn.
    “I love my job, I want a good life. But it’s like there’s a completely separate creature, living inside my body, whispering in my ear. And he’s competing for control of my mind.
    “I have tried to come to terms with it, but it’s too strong.
    “On my bad days, I wonder what will happen when I lose the strength to fight, and he takes over completely.
    “When that day comes, I wonder… will there be