away. His face was perfectly still and blank and remained so throughout
the next thirty minutes, during which Monica tutored, tortured and teased the
gauche intense boy, drawing from him ever more evidence of a massive music potential.
Tara found herself growing
increasingly apprehensive at the prospect of being placed under the merciless
spotlight of Monica’s tuition. It was not so much her conviction that her own
skill in no way measured up to what she had heard so far, but more an intense
reluctance to be shown up as mediocre in Xavier’s eyes.
Her nerves began to sing with
tension. When Monica eventually called on her to take up her violin her hands
were trembling so much she feared she would not even be able to pull the bow
across the strings.
Monica listened to her playing
for a few seconds before stopping her abruptly. ‘That’s good. Quite nice. But
there is too much tension. Relax, my dear. Take deep breaths.’ She expanded her
own ample chest in demonstration, and Tara had no option but to huff and puff
along with her.
She started again, some Bach this
time, one of the partitas.
Again Monica stopped her. ‘Still
too much tightness, too many nerves. Listen, it happens to all of us, these
wretched nerves. I’m nervous.’
‘No, you’re not!’ Tara shot back
at her.
Monica laughed. ‘OK, it’s
different for me. Of course it is. Why don’t you go and sit down for a few
minutes, get your breath back and then we’ll try again.’
Her face hot and crimson, Tara
did as she was directed whilst the other young woman was put through her paces.
Tara wondered whether to leave now. Very quietly, no fuss, no drama. She knew
she had no chance of showing whatever talent she possessed in these
surroundings. And certainly not under the hawk-like gaze of Xavier whose silent
presence seemed to permeate the room.
In fact Monica did not demand a
second performance from her but invited her to join in a final group session
where the three instrumentalists played together whilst Monica accompanied them
on the piano.
At the close of the session
Monica spoke to her three pupils, making a brief appraisal of what she had
heard, making it clear she was interested in tutoring the young man further.
She told the young woman that she was going to recommend her to her own agent
as a prospective client.
She turned last to Tara. ‘Quite
nice decisive playing once you got rid of those nerves. Very physical playing in fact,’ she observed carefully. ‘A nice tone as well.’
Tara stiffened. This was
definitely a case of damning with faint praise.
‘You must go away, get some good
tutoring and practise for around a year,’ Monica smiled. ‘Then you could well
try for a place in one of the provincial orchestras. They need young players of
spirit like you. All in all, I think you will do very well, my dear.’
Tara placed her instrument in its
case. Her stomach still churned. Her brain felt numb. She cursed herself for
having laid her head on this particular chopping block. She hoped desperately
that Xavier would continue to show little interest in her presence. With relief
she saw that he was fully engaged in talking with Monica, frowning and nodding
his head.
Unobtrusively nodding her
farewells Tara moved towards the door and slipped through, gaining an immediate
sense of release. Out in the street she breathed deeply, savouring the fresh,
sharp air. She debated going to see Bruno, but hesitated thinking it would be
unfair to disturb him if he was studying.
A strong purposeful hand grasped
her elbow. ‘I’ll take you home, Tara.’
Her heart jumped. Looking up she
connected with Xavier’s impassive gaze. In the bright afternoon light she
noticed that his eyes were flecked with streaks of deep sapphire. They glinted
in the depth of the cool grey irises, suggesting some underlying wildness of
personality which contrasted strongly with his remote and rigidly controlled
exterior.
Still touchy and defensive after
the