matters, I was beyond your aid long ago. Iâm not sure when the student surpassed the teacher, but itâs been many cycles.â
âOh, the dokshin is deep this morning!â He laughed, delighted to see her so happy. âI see your joining has made you completely insufferable, as if you werenât already well on your way.â
Crossing one leg over the other, she exuded satisfaction and contentment. âI speak mere truth and you call me insufferable. This says much about your own self-doubts, Micah. I can help you with those.â
âNo thanks. With your kind of help it would be another three cycles before I touched the skin of a woman.â
âWell, thereâs something to be said for quality versus quantity. But I forget, you have no time for complicated issues such as true joining.â
âIâm glad it was so perfect and true. Will there be a Sharing, then?â
Her easy contentment vanished. âWeâve only just joined! Give me a little time.â
A Sharing was normally more intimate than a mere physical joining. Sexual pleasure was simple and transitory, but to open oneâs full emotions to another, with no front at all, required a level of trust that most Alseans did not give so early in an acquaintance. Especially someone like Tal. And especially when that Sharing meant revealing a rather large secret.
âI wish I could,â he said, âbut your time is limited.â
âBelieve me, I know. I want to tell her. Iâve already let too many opportunities pass, butâ¦itâs been too long since a woman wanted me for myself. Iâd forgotten what it felt like.â
âIt has not been that long. Captain Serrado knew who you were.â
Tal looked pained. âDarzen is not Ekatya.â
âAh. Sheâs a vacation tryst, then?â
âNo, sheâs more than that.â She shook her head. âYou knew that. Youâre baiting me.â
âI want to understand. Tell me.â Micah leaned forward, watching her fidget in her chair.
âSheâs good for me in so many ways. Smart and funny and thoughtful and easy to be with. And she challenges me and keeps me thinking. I doubt I would grow bored with her. Butâ¦â She hesitated.
âBut?â
âSheâs not my tyree.â
âOh, Tal.â He sat back, his heart aching for her. âWeâre not all destined to be tyrees. You cannot turn your back on someone who is good for you and may love you, simply because you hope for more. That âmoreâ might never come. You know how rare it is.â
âI know, I know. But Iâve felt it.â She looked up at him, a deep longing in her expression. âEkatya and Lhyn couldnât feel it on their own, so I linked them. Every night for a nineday and a half, I was part of a tyree bond.â
He sucked in a breath, and she gave him a wry smile.
âThatâs why I didnât tell you.â
âIâm not judging,â he said. âIâm justâ¦â
âShocked.â
He nodded. âYouâre not usually soâ¦imprudent. You linked a pair of sonsales tyrees. Thereâs no precedent for that. You had no idea what it would do.â But it didnât take much thought to come up with the most likely scenario. âThey couldnât control it. It all came back on you, didnât it? Why would you do that to yourself?â
âBecause they didnât understand. Fahla gave them one of her greatest gifts, but not the ability to truly feel it or understand it. I couldnât stand by and let them flounder when it was so easy to show them the truth. It was an in-the-moment decision the first time, and an addiction after that. Yes, it was impulsive and unwise, but it was the most spectacular thing Iâve ever felt. Ever. And then they left, and it was gone. I thought Iâd come to peace with that. I thought I could make Alsea my bondmate. But