as the tears start up again. “I know, I know, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I’m just tired of people dying on me. When they live…it gives me hope. Hope that everything will be okay with me.”
“ Everything is fine with you Sydney. You have lots of people in your life that love you and you’ve got a great career.”
How can I make Lucas understand? Every time someone like Rosa dies, it scares me; makes me feel incredibly mortal. What if I don’t find someone to love before I go on to the next life? Is this going to be it? I went to medical school, saved a few people’s lives, didn’t save some others, and then poof, I’m gone too?
“I want more than that, Lucas.”
He is quiet, but he’s stroking my hair which feels really, really good. Why couldn’t I just now be meeting Lucas? Why can’t this be the start of something and not the pitiful end of something?
As the tears trickle onto my lab coat, I close my eyes and try to shut out the world. But more importantly, I attempt to silence my own fears of loneliness.
My cell phone buzzes on the table. When I don’t move to answer it, Lucas picks it up.
“Caller ID says it’s your sister, Dionne.”
I frown. Not in the mood to answer it, but I know that if I don’t, she’ll just keep calling me back. Grudgingly, I take the phone from Lucas.
“Hello.”
“ It feels like I’m dying.”
“ What’s wrong? Are you bleeding? Have you been in an accident? Call 9-1-1!”
Dionne howls into the phone.
“Dionne! Tell me what’s happening!”
“ My stomach! It hurts!”
“ Call 9-1-1! I’m on my way.”
“ No, I can’t call 9-1-1. They’ll tell Rod I took the fertility drugs.”
“ Oh my Lord! I’m on my way!
I stand from the table as the adrenaline pumps through my system. For the second time today, I’m in auto-pilot mode.
~ 17~
Dionne
“ Did my husband get here yet?”
The nurse, who is probably sick of me by now, shakes her head for the third time. I broke down and called Rod as soon as I called the ambulance. Sydney scared me; acted like I was about to give up the ghost, so I panicked and asked him to meet me at the hospital.
He should be here by now.
The nurse takes my blood pressure and my temperature again. I had a one hundred four degree temperature when the paramedics got to me, but it’s down to one hundred now. My blood pressure is back down to normal too.
“ Get some rest,” the nurse says. “The doctor will be in here to talk to you in a little bit.”
“ Rest? I’m wide awake. I just need to see my husband. Do you think you can page the hospital for him? What if he can’t find me?”
The nurse shakes her head. “No, ma’am, I cannot page him, but if he goes to any information desk, they can tell him that you are still in the emergency room.”
“ Well, what if you move me? Are you moving me?”
Sydney tears into the small room with a crazy look on her face. “Dee! Are you okay?”
“ No, Syd. I’m not okay. I’m lying in a hospital bed with tubes up my arms.”
Sydney crosses her arms across her body and frowns. “Okay, don’t get testy with me. I didn’t put you here. What did the doctor say?”
“ Nothing yet, he hasn’t been here, but I think I know what it is.”
“ What do you think it is?”
I take a deep breath and say, “Probably the Follostim I’ve been taking.”
I knew that Sydney would trip when I told her this, but she’s standing here looking like I’ve been sipping my tea with a few cubes of arsenic. I’m just trying to get pregnant. It’s not that serious for her face to be all fallen like it is right now.
“Do you know the side effects of that drug?”
I nod once. “Yes. The biggest one is pregnancy.”
“ You and Rod are the last people that need a baby. Where is he anyway? Does he know you’re here?”
“ Yes. He said that he’d meet
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