bliss.
Stop. Thinking. About. Hawk.
I have a date tonight. With Norman. To watch a movie. I don’t even know which one. He mentioned an action flick and that sounds good. Definitely not in the mood to watch romantic drama right now. Some explosions might be good for my bruised soul.
I’ve also booked my flight to visit Mom next month. A change of environment might lift me out of my funk, remind me that everything’s fine.
That I don’t need Hawk.
“You look great,” Dorothy gushes, coming to stand in front of me and tweaking my ponytail. “And happy. Good for you, girl.”
I’m not happy. I’m tired. I’m sad. But I keep my smile on.
“What about you? Going out with Kenny?”
“Nah.” She and Kenny have been going out for a month now, and it doesn’t look like it’s going to last much longer. “I have an assignment to work on, anyway.”
“Come with us to the movies.”
“That’s not exactly conducive to kissing and sexing, is it?” She wags a finger at me. “Go get him, tiger.”
Only I don’t know if I want to get Norman, if I want to kiss and have sex with him.
The thought makes me gag a little. That’s not a good sign, is it?
Okay, all ready to go. Got my cell, my watermelon-flavored chewing gums, my lipstick, my coat. Norman is picking me up, which is sort of old-fashioned and might even be cute, only I don’t feel the vibe. Should I find a pair of fifties horn-rim glasses and a polka dress?
And why am I pissed at Norman before I’ve even gone to the movies with him?
Jesus.
Waiting for Normal to arrive, I flip through the photos on my phone. There’s one of me and Dorothy, making scary faces outside the place where she works part-time. Another of me and Mom at the old harbor, drinking Martinis.
And one of Hawk. He’s asleep on his stomach, blond hair hiding his face, his magnificent back and ass on full display.
I run my fingertip over the screen and bite my lip, and hell, how can anyone top this? This body, this intensity. The way he makes my heart ache sometimes, when he lets his guard down.
Stop it, Layla.
But of course my phone starts jumping in my hands, and Hawk’s name blinks on the screen, as if summoned.
Jeez.
My heart thumping unsteadily, I connect the call. “Yeah?”
“Hey, Doll . How have you been?”
The thrill of hearing his deep voice again stirs heat in my belly and sends my pulse booming in my ears.
It’s impossible to stop my body from reacting to him.
“Okay. Studying a lot. And you? Where did you vanish to this time?”
A small pause, and I hold my breath, because it came out more accusatory than I meant it to be. Less aggressive than I feel, though, too, so there’s that.
“Remember my friend who was missing?”
“Jordan. The one you went to Mexico for.”
“That’s the one. He surfaced, and there has been some trouble.”
“Trouble? You okay?” My heart speeds up again at the thought of anything happening to him.
“Yeah. Everything’s fine.” I hear voices talking in the background, and I wish he’d tell me more.
How long can you wait for someone to let you in?
“That’s awesome,” I say, meaning it. “So glad you got your friend back.”
“We’re cousins, in fact,” he says—one of those crumbs of info he bestows on me occasionally and that I cherish long after, because they are so rare. “But we’re more like brothers.”
And I’m glad he has some family to call his own—someone closer to him than his distant parents.
God, I shouldn’t fall into this trap again. Shouldn’t worry about him.
“Wanna meet tonight?” he asks, and my mouth is already forming the Yes I want to give him.
I force myself to stop. “Can’t. I’m going out.”
“With your nerdy roommate?”
“Nah. A classmate.”
“A girl?”
“A
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