at?â
âIâm just standing here.â
âMe too.â So we both do. Uncomfortably and for a while.
âNow what are you gonna do?â I ask.
âIâm not done standing here.â
âItâs Wednesday night and you got nothing to do?â
âYou think I got nothing to do just because I got no man around?â
âI didnât mean it like that, I just figured your plans have changed and you might not have made new ones yet.â
âSo?â
âSo?â
âSo donât you got anything better to do?â she asks.
âI donât really like to make plans. They fuck me up.â
âWhatâs that mean?â
âNothing. Long story.â
We both just stand here for a little while brooding.
âWanna go for a walk?â I finally ask.
She looks at me like I got problems. âA walk? Where?â
âI donât know. Around?â
âAround where?â
âAround New York.â
âAre you wacked?â she says like sheâs asking me what time it is.
âNo,â I explain. Then I get skeptical of my answer. âWhy?â
âYou feel like youâre a little off kinda.â
âLook, Iâm having a really bad year and your day doesnât seem to be any better, so Iâm going to get a beer and take a walk, youâre welcome to come or not come.â
She looks at me like this makes no sense and therefore complete sense. âAh-ight. Iâma go for a walk. Damn this guy is trippin.â
Â
Weâve made our way into a vintage clothes shop on Avenue A. Stephanie liked a shirt in the window. Iâm holding a beer in a bag and the saleswoman welcomed us in with a smile, but has been scoping me from behind the counter ever since.
âSee now this can be all me.â Stephanie checks herself out in a three-way mirror wearing a white billowy shirt.
âThen buy it.â
âNaw, I donât just buy stuff.â
âWhy not?â
âIf I want it, I leave it.â She turns to get a side view. âI leave it for like two days then I come back just to make sure we still good together.â
âWhoâs still good?â
âMe and the shirt. Yo, pay attention.â She turns to face me. âNow, what you think?â
I crank up a little excitement and say, âI like it,â then take a sip of my beer.
âI hate that word. Like. I like it ,â she says in a sarcastic high-pitched voice. And turns back to the mirror. âDonât you hate that word?â
âNot particularly.â
âI mean I like food, but thatâs cause I got no choice but to eat.If I get to pick something Iâma love it. Why I wanna waste my time on shit I only like? I donât gots a lot of clothes, but I love everything I wear.â
âI guess I love pizza. But not with broccoli. Broccoli on pizza is a yuppie sacrilege.â
âYo, shut up, yo and tell me what you think of the shirt already.â
âWhy do you care what I think?â
âCause your night sucks like mine.â
âThatâs a good enough reason. Turn around.â I take my time. âIf weâre talking about picking things cause we love them then get rid of that thing.â
âWhy,â she says, all surprised and offended.
âBecause it ainât for you. It looks good in some spots, you know like itâs saying you look good right here â¦â I hold my hand in front of her boobs.
âBut?â she says, leaning back.
âBut at your waist it kind of puffs out and makes you look bigger than you are. And ⦠let me see something.â I lift the tag that hangs off the sleeve and read a handwritten $55 . âItâs costing you way too much to not be in love with every part of you. Hang that shit back up.â
âYo, donât you know shit? You not supposed to tell a girl she look fat.â
âI didnât say you