themâchangeling soldiers burn a lot of energy. The waterâs infused with minerals and other stuff.â
She nodded and took another delicious gulp. âTastes good.â
He tugged back her head with the hand he had in her hair. âWhat the hell was that about?â
She couldnât bring herself to tell him the complete truth but she forced herself to tell one. Her deadly little secret didnât need to be revealed. Not yet. Perhaps not ever. âI told you, I hate violence,â she reminded him. âYou went too far with that talk of warm blood.â
His hand clenched in her hair before he released it, a penetrating expression on his face. âYou had no trouble with discussing the dead boys.â
She clutched at her stomach. âItâs psychological.â She stood her ground, knowing if she gave even an inch, Clay would walk straight over her. âCan we go? Thereâsâ¦â She nodded at the people peering out the windows of a nearby apartment building.
He ignored her request. âWhy didnât the Larkspurs take you to someone who couldâve helped you get a handle on these things?â
âThey did.â She swung her legs back into the car and, closing her eyes, leaned her head against the seat. âIâm too screwed up to fix.â
The passenger door slid shut and a second later, she felt Clay get back into the driverâs seat. âThatâs a load of crap,â he said once he had them moving again. âYou never were good at handling blood. You almost passed out that time I cut my knee on a fence.â
Her gorge rose at even that harmless memory. Taking another drink, she focused on the piercing sparks of light exploding behind her eyelids. âI got worse. After.â
Silence.
Then, âAfter me or after him ?â
âDoes it matter?â She realized sheâd drained the water bottle.
âI guess not. Youâre still as fucked up.â
It hurt. âYeah.â
He swore. âJesus, Talin. Whereâs your spine?â
That made her eyes snap open. âYouâre insulting me to get me to react? What the hell kind of a bedside manner is that?â Outraged, she chucked the empty bottle into the pristine backseat. âI almost threw up my guts and youââ
âWhen did you become such a scared little mouse?â His tone was hard, his eyes trained on the road.
âTrauma, Clay! I was traumatized. It had an effect.â
âSo was I,â he said, merciless. âI didnât deal by sticking my head in the sand.â
She knew immediately that he wasnât talking about the killing. âYou saved me.â
His laughter was harsh. âYears too late.â
âNo.â She had to reach him, had to make him see. âOrrin never tried to choke me before.â Heâd wanted to watch the life leave her eyes, just like heâd done with those other girls heâd buried.
âHe abused you, Talin. Hurt you, touched you, made you suffer through things no little girl should have to endure. So what if he saved the brutal murder for your eighth birthday! I fucking should have stopped him long before that!â
âI never told you,â she cried. âAnd you were a child, too.â
âI should have known. Iâm a catâI could smell him on you.â
âHe was my foster parent. I remember you telling me you could smell their parents on all the kids.â
He didnât respond. She stared at the dark stubble along his jaw, at the ebony silk of his hair. He was so close and yet she didnât dare touch him. âClay?â Talk to me, please, she wanted to beg. He had always spoken to her, even if he didnât to anyone else.
His fingers clenched on the steering wheel. âTell me about your life with the Larkspurs.â
Relieved, she took a deep, shuddering breath. âTheyâre farmers, all of them. Well, Dixie isnât, but