Free Michael’s Wife by Marlys Millhiser Page B

and his father to love him, Claire to take care of him, and a wealthy family to see that he would never want for anything. He definitely did not need a mixed-up mother. Besides, I’m not convinced I am his mother. And I’m scared to death of his father. It wouldn’t work out, ever .
    She started pacing the room again. I don’t want to be Laurel. Laurel is no good … walking out on her own baby … I don’t want to be her !
    She found herself facing the double mirrors over the dresser and the image she would never get used to. There was an adolescent pout about her lips that she didn’t like. Was it the sophistication of makeup or had the once-blank expression in her eyes grown wary and suspicious? Look what they’ve done to me in just a week . She was beginning to look like a … a Laurel … immature, selfish. I could swear I didn’t look like this a week ago .
    On a hunch and to pass the time she began searching the drawers of the dresser, most of them filled with the clothes she had bought in Tucson. Two were empty. She looked about the room. If Michael had kept any mementoes of Laurel, they had probably been moved with his things. In the carved wooden commode table by the bed there was nothing but a small box containing rosary beads. He probably wouldn’t keep any hateful reminder of Laurel.
    The wardrobe that Michael had used had two drawers beneath and room above for hanging clothes. The drawers were empty and she had to stand on the floor of the upper section to reach to the back of the shelf above the hangers. There were two shoe boxes in one corner, and she pulled them out and laid them on the floor. Kneeling beside them, she wiped the dust from her hands onto the red rug.
    The first box held a small assortment of mementoes. She felt guilty prying into Michael’s life this way. A certificate of graduation from a Catholic academy, another from the School of Engineering at the University of Arizona, Tucson. A yellowed newspaper clipping with a picture of a man and a boy in a rubber raft on swirling water with the caption, PAUL ELLIOT DEVEREAUX I AND SON MICHAEL 9 SHOOT RAPIDS ON COLORADO RIVER. The picture was taken from a distance, and one could not recognize the figures without the caption. There were two small model airplanes, one with a broken wing.
    Laurel opened the second box and found three rings, a billfold, and a woman’s watch. She put all three rings in the palm of her hand. They were white gold or platinum, two bands and an impressive solitaire diamond, emerald cut. Laurel’s wedding and engagement rings and Michael’s wedding band. The diamond and the smaller band fit her ring finger. She slipped them off quickly and picked up the billfold.
    There was a quarter and a penny in one pocket but no bills. The plastic fold-out held a sober picture of a younger Michael, a Standard Oil Credit Card, a Colorado drivers’ license made out to Laurel Jean Devereaux with a colored picture of a woman’s head. It could be a picture of her; she wasn’t sure. The dark hair was short and long bangs came down to the eyebrows. Other details listed told her Laurel was 5 feet 6 inches, weighed 118 pounds, had brown hair and eyes, and had applied for the license three years before. The birth date would make her twenty-eight. I feel younger than twenty-eight .
    She looked hard at the picture of a heavy woman with graying hair and glasses in a blue sweater. Laurel’s mother? A Denver Public Library card. Another card from the State University of Iowa, Iowa City, Iowa … “This is to certify that Laurel Jean Lawrence was granted the degree of Bachelor of Arts; Major Area: History.”
    Lawrence … Laurel Jean Lawrence … Iowa City, Iowa . Even this did not stir her memory. Next on the fold-out was a Social Security card made out to Laurel J. Devereaux and last was an identification card from the Denver Public Schools allowing Laurel