Free Swallows and Amazons by Arthur Ransome Page B

thieves?
    NANCY. They should be hanged on Execution Dock!
    ROGER. Hanged and drawn and quartered!
    FLINT. Do you know… I’m not going to do anything at all. I only wanted my book back, and now, thanks to you, I have it. If the policeman tracks down the culprits, I’m sure he’ll have a quiet word with them.
    JOHN. They’ll be disappointed enough when they come back and find the treasure gone.
    TITTY. Let’s leave them a note!
    FLINT. Good idea.
    JOHN. Yes. Who has paper and pen?
    ALL. Not me. No.
    JOHN. Then we’ll carve it – on this.
    JOHN picks up a flat piece of driftwood, and takes out his penknife .
    NANCY. It’ ll have to be short, then.
    SUSAN. What about ‘Ha, ha’? That’s bound to annoy them.
    PEGGY and NANCY smirk .
    FLINT. Very good, Mister Mate. I think that’s it.
    JOHN starts to carve it out .
    ROGER. And… and then we could put… we could put… ‘You are very nasty, bad pirates…’
    Unseen by ROGER, a cormorant is coming up behind him .
    SUSAN. Roger…
    ROGER. And we, the Swallows and Amazons, are the terror of these seas, and…
    TITTY. Roger…
    ROGER. And when we find out who you are we will come to you in the black of night and…
    The cormorant nudges him with his beak .
    And…
    He turns. The cormorant screeches .
    Ah!
    ROGER runs. The cormorant chases him. The others laugh .
    Help! Get away from me! Get away from me!
    SUSAN. Roger, calm down.
    ROGER. Help!
    He runs into the sea. The cormorant comes after him . ROGER starts to swim. The cormorant loses interest .
    JOHN. Roger? You’re swimming!
    ROGER. I am? I am!
    He is so excited, he forgets to swim for a second, and starts to sink, but then immediately rights himself .
    Hurrah!
    ALL. Hurrah! Well done, Roger!
    Scene Seven
    The following afternoon. The Battle of Houseboat Bay .
    CAPTAIN FLINT is standing on the deck of his houseboat. He is wearing a sun helmet, and has a red handkerchief tied around his middle. His parrot is on his shoulder .
    The houseboat is flying a green flag with a picture of a large walrus on it .
    CAPTAIN FLINT scans the surrounding waters .
    CAPTAIN FLINT. Come on – show yourselves! I know you’re out there! Come on, you pestilent sea dogs, come and do your worst! If you had the pluck of a weevil in a biscuit you’d show yourselves!
    Suddenly, the Swallow and the Amazon, with their crews aboard, emerge from the haze, singing. They advance on the houseboat .
    Aha! That’s more like it! Prepare to swim with the fishes! Them that die’ll be the lucky ones!
    The boats draw near . ROGER suddenly blows a loud whistle repeatedly, and the attack begins .
    ALL. Hurrah! War! Attack!
    They begin to hurl their arrows at the houseboat .
    FLINT. Ha! I have an answer for that!
    He immediately fires his cannon at them .
    Take that, you swabs!
    TITTY. And you take that, you old codfish!
    TITTY and SUSAN begin to hurl pine cones at CAPTAIN FLINT. Most of them fall short, but a few reach him, and he pretends to be caught in their explosions .
    FLINT. Ah! Ah!
    ROGER throws twigs .
    ROGER. And that! And that!
    JOHN. Slacken away your mainsheet, Amazon! Come alongside!
    NANCY. Aye, aye.
    CAPTAIN FLINT. I’m still standing! I’ve got you now!
    ROGER. He’s going for the cannon again!
    PEGGY throws firecrackers .
    PEGGY. See how you like these!
    CAPTAIN FLINT. Ah! Ah! Dastardly! Devilish!
    JOHN. Prepare to board!
    NANCY. Aye, aye!
    The boats are now alongside .
    CAPTAIN FLINT. Marauders, Polly! Prepare to repel! Prepare to repel!
    POLLY. Pretty Polly!
    JOHN. Cutlasses at the ready! Attack!
    The SWALLOWS and AMAZONS pour onto the houseboat . CAPTAIN FLINT grabs two cushions and begins to whirl them round his head –
    CAPTAIN FLINT. Ah… h!
    They charge at him, and he bashes them over the head . PEGGY spots his stockpile of cushions .
    PEGGY. Here! Here!
    She throws them out and they all attack back .
    NANCY. At him,