Free Kingsholt by Susan Holliday Page B

only she could forget Nimbus. She wondered why it was so difficult when he was bringing her nothing but misery. Even now she could feel his deep hypnotic gaze, touching her, overwhelming her. The drink and pills made her feel strangely powerful, which was more than she did without them. But she must fight her feelings.
She must get back the map and never see Nimbus again.
Then the other voice started up, the one that felt sorry for an outsider, for she was one herself.
The truth is Mum and Dad simply don’t care.
    She forced herself to get up and go to the window. Leela was passing in her yellow sari and at the sight of her, some new innocence stirred in Chloe’s heart and mind. It no longer seemed impossible to go up to the attic and play around.
    Sam was already up there, looking out of the dusty window. The room was full of junk and boxes and piles done up in string or rope.
    He pulled out two puppets from an old box and held them up. Out of the two he chose the red cheeked clown wearing a blue striped trouser suit. He flopped it down on top of the dusty box so that its strings became tangled. Chloe picked up the other puppet and examined its fluffed-out brown hair and spherical grin. She danced it up and down. ‘Do you remember how we used to do plays?’
    Sam picked up the first clown and undid the knots.
    ‘Hallo,’ he said in a squeaky voice, ‘I’m a magic clown.’
    ‘And I’m a pear shaped princess,’ said Chloe in a light voice. ‘I’m lost, I’m lost, I’m lost. Can you tell me the way home?’
    ‘Follow me, Princess.’
    Sam danced the puppet all-round the attic, while Chloe followed, skipping her princess over the old luggage and packing cases and back to the window. Sam went down into the dim reaches under the eaves and let his clown slump on the floor. They laughed together at their game. ‘Second childhood,’ said Sam.
    Then something caught Chloe’s eye and she opened the window, leaning into its patch of sunlight. When at last she turned round her expression had changed.
    ‘What’s the matter?’
    ‘Nothing. I’m going down.’
    ‘What for?’
    ‘There are things you simply don’t understand, Sam Penfold. All this prancing about – it’s crazy. We’re not children anymore.’
    ‘It was just a bit of fun. In short supply these days.’
    Chloe made a rush for the door. ‘Nimbus is down there waiting for me. I have to get —’
    ‘You’re not going!’ Sam pulled her back but she struggled free.
    ‘Get out of my way, Sam. You don’t understand. You go and play football or something. That’s just about your limit.’ She ran back to the door and Sam spoke quickly. ‘Don’t go, Chloe. You can’t trust Nimbus. You’re a puppet in his hands. Get it? He’s caught up!’
    ‘Caught up!’ she mocked. ‘All right, maybe I’m caught up. Listen, Sam, there’s lots of ways of looking at things. There are people in this world who haven’t had the privilege of learning to read or write. What’s wrong with my helping them?’
    ‘I suppose you’re referring to that geriatric hippy who’s old enough to be your father. Tell me, Chloe, what’s going on between you and him?’
    Chloe turned the door handle. ‘Okay then, since you ask for it, I’ll tell you what’s happening. Rosie was my age when she was killed by Uncle George. The truth is Nimbus is in grief. NowGina’s left with the baby. How do you think he feels about that? He needs help. He needs me. He’s about the only person who does.’
    ‘Pull the other one,’ said Sam. ‘He needs you for what he can get out of you.’
    Chloe pointed her finger. ‘So you’re on Aidan’s side.’
    ‘I’m on your side, Chloe, though I can’t think why.’
    ‘Nor can I,’ she said as she went out.
    Sam went over to the window and waited for Chloe to come into sight. Below him, the roof sloped down with tiles missing and ivy poking up and over the edges like green fingers. He could see Bones Wood rising up, the place where