Free Sheer Luck by Kelly Moran Page A

She committed suicide last summer.”
    Fuck me. Her voice cracked and I flew out of
my seat. Wrapping my arms around her, I carried her into the living
room, sat on the couch, and set her in my lap. She curled into me,
and though I knew she was crying, the tears didn’t break her or
turn into sobs.
    Helpless, I smoothed her hair and let her
be. To lose her parents at such a young age, and then her sister to
suicide, had to have created an empty void. And a fault complex in
the form of survivor’s guilt.
    Everyone in her life had walked. Her life
had been a series of shitstorms, and I was just another high wind
creating chaos.
    She sighed. “Iris and I made an interesting
pair. She was all out, skated the edge and wasn’t afraid to take
chances. And I was scared of everything. Nothing but the straight
and narrow for me, to the point I only existed in the books I
read.”
    Her sudden decision to live a little made
sense now. “So you are venturing out of your bubble.”
    “Yeah.” She adjusted her position and skirt
to straddle me, our faces inches apart. Even with red, swollen
eyes, she was fucking beautiful. “I came to the conclusion I needed
a happy middle. Live, but not recklessly.” She laughed. “I got the
tattoo first. For...luck.”
    Oh, the irony. I smiled anyway, loving the
shamrock on her nape. “Very sexy. What else?”
    She shrugged as if shy. How endearing. “I
bought the motorcycle and a new wardrobe.” Her teeth sunk into her
lower lip as her gaze wandered my face. “I took Aiden up on his
offer to visit the pub. Before Iris died, I pretty much went to
work and back home. I’ve been trying to get out more.”
    Her gaze met mine and she sighed, world
weary. “Not exactly living on the edge, but I’ve mapped out a few
places I’d like to travel. Made some changes.”
    I tucked her hair behind her ears and let my
fingers linger in the soft, dark strands. “You’re doing great. It
takes a lot of courage to do what you did. I’m just sorry you lost
your sister that way.” I paused, but to hell with it. “Do you want
a big family? Kids someday?”
    She nodded, but the gesture seemed
distracted. “It won’t make up for all I’ve lost, but a husband and
children of my own would be a perfect way to build a new family.”
She shook her head as if to clear it and smiled. “What about you?
What do you want? A room at the Playboy mansion? A yacht in
Cozumel?”
    Though her distraction technique was cute,
and her smile always pulled one from me, I couldn’t do it. I
couldn’t pretend.
    She appeared to recognize my struggle right
away, her smile gradually slipping and her eyes sad. Cupping my
jaw, she held my face in her hands as if I was the treasure.
“If there was no curse, if you had nothing holding you back, what
would you want?”
    “You.” I’d throw away every cent in my bank
account, do whatever it took. But that wouldn’t matter because her
and I could never be more than the best seven days of my life.
    If she was surprised by my response, and she
shouldn’t have been, it didn’t register in her expression.
“Why?”
    My head fell back to the couch. It wasn’t as
if I didn’t know the answer, but her wanting one shocked me.
Honesty at all times. That was one of my stipulations. At this
point, what was one more heap of oh-shit to the pile?
    I drew a shallow breath, looking at her and
keeping my expression open. “Because I didn’t believe in love at
first sight until I saw you sitting on a park bench. It’s not the
basis for a relationship, but you proved to me that feeling can be
built upon. You’re brave and kind and funny and smart. You don’t
let the world bring you down and you have an uncanny ability to see
beauty in even the ugliest of things. You have an open mind and an
even more open heart. That’s why.”
    The regret in her eyes hurt me to the bone.
Long, aching minutes, we stared. Somewhere in those ticks of the
clock, I’d stopped breathing. Her, too, it